


Stars are Only Visible in Darkness

by cosim18



Series: Under Pink Skies [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, Goodbye Sex, Love Confessions, Past Stiles Stilinski/Malia Tate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 23:50:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8774575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosim18/pseuds/cosim18
Summary: Following the departure of her love, Malia struggles to stay human and control her inner coyote. She finds help and consolation in an unexpected source - Lydia.**imported chapters from unnamed Malydia femslash week piece**





	1. Cause you haunt me, baby

**Author's Note:**

> The first chapter takes place a few days before the scene in 5x20 when Lydia and Malia walk into the school and Kira says goodbye to Scott, and the rest will occur after season 5. Mature rating for future chapters.
> 
> You can find me on tumblr at http://gaycoyotes.tumblr.com/

M: Need help. Can you meet me?  
L: Where?  
M: Lookout Point.  
L: Be there in ten.

Staring down at the town in front of her, Malia heaved a sigh, waiting as patiently as she could. The full moon was tomorrow, and she was already feeling the pull of it. Things were different now, everything just felt sort of off without her there. She stared up at the sky, hoping that it looked the same as where her love was, but she had no idea what things were like there in the desert. Sitting down on the rocks, she wrapped her arms around her knees and leaned her chin onto her forearm, staring at Beacon Hills. For so long, the forest behind her was her home, until Scott and his pack came and saved her. It took a while, and a lot of convincing from Stiles, to make her believe that staying human was best for her. But without her fox, everything felt wrong. 

Hearing the sound of tires rolling on the dirt and gravel, Malia stood up and walked over to the car. Lydia looked beautiful as ever, and she wondered if the fiery-haired girl ever even slept.

“Hey, you okay? I’m not used to being the one you call for help,” Lydia said, concern hinting in her voice.

“Yeah, I know. But Scott’s busy helping Liam with lacrosse, and you know Stiles and I aren’t really back to regular speaking terms again. Plus, well, she’s gone. So that leaves you.”

“Well it’s good to know that I’m last on your help list,” Lydia muttered to herself. She knew it wasn’t necessarily personal, but it did hurt a little that Malia didn’t feel completely comfortable talking to her about things like this. “Is it the full moon? I thought you were in better control lately.”

“I was! But… without Kira here, and Stiles moving on from our relationship, I don’t really feel like I have anyone to help hold me back, to keep me human. Absorbing my mom’s powers was great, but I didn’t expect the coyote to be so much more forceful. I know I need to gain some sort of control again, but I don’t really know how.” Malia was wringing her hands together, pacing slightly in agitation.

“Okay, well let’s think it through, step by step. Maybe that will give you some clarity,” Lydia suggested, leading them back to the edge of the rocks. They sat there, legs dangling from the ledge, and looked back out at Beacon Hills. “What were you thinking when you texted me? What emotions were you feeling?”

“Oh come on, Lydia, we both know emotions aren’t exactly my strong suit.” She rolled her eyes, scoffing to herself.

“Hey, you’re still only a werecoyote, which means you have some human inside of you. That means you’ve got to be feeling something, even if you don’t want to admit it. Seriously, what specifically is pulling you back tonight?” She placed a tentative hand on Malia’s shoulder, giving her some physical support.

“I guess not having someone with me. I’m used to having a distraction and being in control of whatever situation I was in. With Stiles, I was always on top, always the ‘big spoon,’ as he put it, and I was more concerned with being a good girlfriend than with the full moon above my head. And with Kira, hell, I could just look at her and stay human. I never felt uncomfortable or unloved with her. She had this way of making me feel like I was the smart one, the one who helped her, and I’m not entirely sure she didn’t need it. Like when we were at Eichen, working together to get you out, I was her support and I was the one encouraging her, so I knew I needed to be strong for her sake. She made me feel special and important, and then she left us.” Malia’s heart starting beating a little faster at the mention of Kira, and she was thankful that Lydia didn’t have heightened senses.

“We both know she left for her own good, and to protect us. She needed to learn to find her own inner strength, and her own form of balance with her animal side. Just like you. Maybe her being gone could be good, at least in the short-term.” She didn’t even sound convinced herself, but she didn’t have any other solid advice to give. Kira’s departure was hard on them all, especially Scott, but Lydia knew that there was something more than friendship between the werecoyote and kitsune.

“Do you know what it feels like to have your heart ripped from you like that, though? And so unexpectedly. I mean, when Stiles and I broke up, it hurt, but it wasn’t as unbearable as this, and it's not like things weren't slowly deteriorating on their own. I don’t know that we were even good together, but it was something, and it was my first real relationship. At least we can stay friends, and I get to see him and remember the fun we used to have. But with her gone, there’s just this hole inside of me. No way to contact her, no way to know if she’s okay.” Malia realized she was more wistfully talking to herself than to Lydia, but she wasn’t embarrassed for Lydia to know the extent to which Malia loved Kira.

“I do know what it’s like, actually," Lydia responded, a harsh bite in her voice that she didn't intend. "Not in quite the same way, but I do. I’ve had so many relationships, some good and some bad, but I don’t regret them. I grew from the mistakes and heartbreak. We didn’t know each other through any of that, but I’ve had my share of heartbreak, Malia. As for having my heart ripped out? I’m not sure if I’ve been the same since Allison died.” Her voice quieted to a shaky whisper at the utterance of that name, the name she hadn’t spoken in a year. Sure, she'd spoken of Allison, but feeling the word on her lips, hearing her own voice say it, almost felt foreign at this point. A few tears rolled down her cheek and she looked up at the stars, wiping them away. She took in a shaky breath, and renewed her voice. 

“Allison was the first real friend I had, the first person I actually opened up to. And to think, I only really approached her because she was pretty and new, and I didn’t want to have to compete with her, so I figured we should be friends. I could never have predicted how close we’d get, or how much she would change me. She's who really got me involved in the supernatural, actually, and without her I wouldn't be anywhere close to the person I am today. She and I had our difficulties, as any friends do, but I loved her with all my heart, and nothing has really been the same since. The rest of junior year, when you joined us, was the hardest time of my life without Allison there. I knew something terrible would happen that day, but I didn't let myself believe it could ever be that. So I think I can understand, at least a little bit, what it’s like to have a piece of your heart taken away.” She chuckled a little, realizing how intimately she had spoken of Allison, knowing that she’d never told anyone this before. “At least with Kira you know she’s alive. She’s too awesome to die in a desert.” She gave a half-hearted smile, knowing it didn’t really help.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think – it’s just, I didn’t know you guys back then, and nobody really talks about her anymore. I didn’t mean to bring up something painful,” Malia said, kicking herself for being so stupid.

“Hey, no, it’s fine, really. I just… I think this is how we’ve all dealt with her not being here anymore. She’ll always be with us in spirit, but it hurts more to think about what could’ve been, so we’ve just settled into this pattern of not mentioning her. It just makes it hurt a little bit less. I used to visit her grave every weekend, did I ever tell you that? Scott didn't even go that often, but I think it was too painful for him. My mom made me stop going so frequently, she said it wasn’t healthy. But I’ve made my peace, and I will always love her. Just like you will always love Kira,” she said, nudging Malia’s side a little bit.

“So you’re saying it won’t always be this painful?” Malia asked, almost whispering. “How? How can I move on and just get past this?”

“Time. It heals all wounds, so they say.”

“Who is they? Did they ever have a girlfriend who discovered that the fox spirit inside of her was too powerful and that she decided to go to a desert to train with other girls, who are not her girlfriend, to try to maintain the freaking balance inside of her? Cause I highly doubt it.” Malia said, obstinate as ever.

“Of course not, Malia. But just trust me. And you can always lean on me,” she said as she herself was leaning into Malia’s side, chuckling a little bit at the slight irony.

“I trust you, Lydia. You’re one of the few people that I actually do trust these days. I opened up to you, didn’t I? Anyone can tell you that's a rare thing to happen.” She said with an unconvincing smile. She looked over and noticed Lydia’s eyes drooping a little. Looking at her watch, she realized it was quite late – 3am to be precise. Not wanting to wake the sleeping beauty, she took off the flannel she was wearing and wrapped it around Lydia, followed by her arm to keep her leaning on her side. The two stayed there the rest of the night, with Malia eventually drifting off as well, leaning on Lydia’s head.


	2. You keep me up at night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia proposes a new way to distract Malia from her aching heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a little iffy on whether or not I'm happy with how this chapter came out since I'm still trying to get a grasp on writing from Lydia and Malia's perspectives.

_ “Hey, isn’t that my flannel?” Malia asked with a smirk on her face. She knew very well what the answer was. _

_ “Oh, I dunno, I have lots of my own…” Kira attempted to respond, but she couldn’t help but giggle. “It’s not like I had clothes of my own at your place, so I had to improvise that night!"  _

_ “I still think you would’ve been fine in your underwear,” Malia said nonchalantly. _

_ “And  _ I _ still think it’s a little illegal to walk around outside in your underwear. Besides, my parents would have killed me if they caught me. They don’t know about us yet, remember?” She briefly flashed back to when her dad jokingly said she could date the coyote that had been haunting Beacon Hills. She didn’t think he’d appreciate her taking him seriously.  _

_ “And are they ever going to know? Not that I have any problem sneaking around, it makes things more fun. But I can sense that you’re anxious about it, and I wouldn’t want you to be anxious over something like our relationship.“ Malia had gotten very good at sensing Kira’s chemosignals, now that she knew her scent more intimately. As Kira finished folding the plaid shirt neatly and placing it in her drawer, she felt Malia snake her arms around her midsection to pull her into a hug. The werecoyote rested her head on the kitsune’s shoulder, breathing in the smell of her skin.  _

_ “I just want you to be happy, and I’m glad to help in any way possible. I’d miss you too much if we weren’t able to be together."  _

_ “I know. And I’d miss you too, and I’d miss kissing you and talking to you and just being with you. I’ve never had a girlfriend before you, didn’t really know I liked girls before you. I’m not letting you get away, even if my parents don’t completely approve of us.“ She turned to face her taller girlfriend and pulled her head down while standing on tippy toes to give Malia a forehead kiss. _

As soon as Kira’s lips touched her forehead, Malia’s eyes shot open. She no longer jolted out of bed like she used to, but she still felt a lingering sadness anytime one of her memories decided to invade her dreams. Leaning over to look at the clock, she saw that it was only 2am. She closed her eyes, running a hand down her face. It had been a week since she and Lydia reminisced over lost loves, and she didn’t know if she could ask the same of her so soon. After trying and failing to fall back asleep for another half hour, though, she hit the ‘send’ button on the text waiting on her phone.

M: Can’t sleep. Lookout Point again?

L: Sure, be there in ten.

"Thanks for coming. I still don’t really know who else to talk to about this.”

“Hey, I owe you, remember? You’re the only one who didn’t treat me like I was a porcelain doll after the pack got me out of Eichen, and you helped me further my awesome fighting skills. The least I can do is come down here in the middle of the night to help mend your broken heart.”

The two sat down, facing each other, and Malia briefly started to fidget with her fingers, unsure of what to do with herself, before she felt Lydia gently grab her hands. She held Malia’s hands together, gently rubbing her thumb along the werecoyote’s wrist. 

“Why don’t you tell me about it? Letting things out instead of bottling everything up is the best option, I’ve learned.”

“It felt like a memory as I was sleeping, I really thought I was back there, that’s how real it felt. We were in her room, putting away the laundry she had just done. Earlier that week, we took a walk and it started to rain, so we rushed to my house to change into warm, dry clothes. It was the first time we’d seen each other so close to naked, actually,” Malia said with a slight blush. “She borrowed one of my flannels, and I’d completely forgotten about it until I saw her folding it up and putting it in her dresser drawer. We flirted a little bit, and when she kissed my forehead, I woke up. It’s like the sensation of her still here woke me, because I knew it couldn’t be real anymore.“

"But it  _ is  _ real. It may be the past, a memory or a fragment of one, but it is real, and you shouldn’t neglect that. Love doesn’t just go away, and moving on is going to take time, trust me,” she said as she once again leaned her head against Malia’s shoulder. “But I am happy to help try and distract you from the pain, hopefully lessening the time you need.” She paused for a beat, seeming to think something over, before asking, “ What do you think about the night sky?”

“Okay, random, but the night sky? Yeah, that’ll definitely distract me from the fact that my girlfriend, or I guess ex-girlfriend, was a supernatural being who helped me stay human when the moon pulled on my coyote side,” Malia said quietly. “I feel like I could find something about any topic that reminds me of her.”

“Maybe that’s the point, or at least part of it,” Lydia said, looking up at the stars above them. “I could teach you the constellations, the way the stars are laid out, and you can look up at them and rest assured that Kira sees the same stars above her head. For all you know, she could be looking up right now, thinking of you. Besides, sometimes darkness can lead to the most beautiful of things.” She meant this to imply the beauty of the stars, but the darkness of Malia's loss would soon lead to the beauty of a new relationship.

“I guess we could try it, if you really think it could help,” Malia said skeptically.

“Then we can start tomorrow, it’s a bit late for stargazing tonight,” Lydia said, showing Malia the time on her watch. “We do have school in like three hours, after all,” she murmured, knowing that her absence wouldn’t cause a stir, but that Malia needed to be in school as much as possible. “And hey, we can move our tutoring sessions out here, with breaks to kick back and stare at the sky!”

Malia could tell Lydia was getting excited about this, and couldn’t help but think that she too was hoping for a distraction from life. She’d just had one of the worst experiences of her life, being held in Eichen House, and she could probably use a little fun and spontaneity as much as Malia could. Malia stood up, wiping off the dirt that had gotten on her jeans, and held out a hand for Lydia to take. 

“Come on, then, up you get. I gotta get you home,” Malia sighed, mostly to herself. Lydia was way too tired to drive on her own, and the rocks were too uncomfortable to sleep on again. She steered the redhead away from her blue Prius, instead placing her in Malia’s car.

“But I drove here,” Lydia groggily stated as Malia leaned across her to secure the seat belt.

“Yes you did,“ Malia responded with a small smile on her face. "But you’re in no condition to drive, so I’m bringing you back to my place. You can sleep on my bed and I’ll take the couch.” Lydia dozed off on the drive out to Malia’s house, and only stirred a little as Malia carried her out of the car and placed her gently on the bed. Malia removed Lydia’s shoes and pulled her covers up over her friend and crept back to the living room to settle in on the couch. She hadn’t realized how exhausted she was until her head hit the pillow, and she was out like a light.

The next morning, Malia was woken up by the sun shining through the window and the presence of Lydia standing in front of her.

“Good morning, sleepy head. Time for school, but you need to drop me at my car first, my stuff is still at Lookout Point.” Lydia said with a chipper smile. Groaning, Malia practically rolled off the couch to force herself to a standing position. She lumbered over to her room and quickly changed before brushing her teeth and washing her face. How Lydia looked so perfect, even after getting up in the middle of the night and sleeping on an unfamiliar bed, Malia would never know.

“Les go,” Malia slurred out, not yet fully awake. She brightened up slightly when Lydia handed her a travel mug, coffee ready to drink. “Oh, thanks. Almost forgot this life-saving nectar,” she said with a smirk.

The ride back to the cliff was mostly uneventful, with the sounds of the road taking up the silence. As Malia stopped the car next to Lydia’s, she grabbed the banshee’s arm. 

“Wait, I just… I wanted to say thanks. Again. It really does mean a lot for you to help so much.” Lydia placed her other hand on top of Malia’s and leaned over to give her a quick peck on the cheek.

“You don’t need to keep thanking me, Malia. I’m happy to help, but only so long as you stop pitying yourself. You are a badass claw-wielding werecoyote and you need to give yourself some credit. Besides, I should thank you for taking care of me last night.” She gave Malia a little smile and patted her hand once more before exiting the car. 

Malia went on to school, parking in her usual spot, and leaned against the hood of the car waiting for Lydia, skimming over a textbook before school started. As soon as Lydia arrived and exited the car, the two stood there for a moment, taking in the strange peace of the school, people busying themselves and heading to class without a clue about what had happened in the previous months. The two girls looked at each other, smiling, ready to take on the next adventure in their lives. Unbeknownst to either of them, for a while, that adventure would be the building of friendship and trust, no supernatural interference at all. 

Lydia hooked her arm in Malia’s and steered her toward the school, eager for night to fall so that they could spend more time together.


	3. Like a whisper in the corner of my lovesick thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Malia makes a new discovery about her heightened abilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to merge my other Malydia story with this one, so, for the most part, the next few chapters will be pulled straight from that fic. I apologize if this sparks any confusion, but in order to move forward with either story, I realized I needed to blend them into one cohesive story. I've made a few edits throughout these imported chapters so that they align with the pre-established story in Stars.

“Why are you naked?” Lydia asked with a mixture of hesitation and amusement. They had agreed to meet at their usual spot that night, so Lydia was taken completely by surprise with the sight in front of her.

“Well, uh, I kind of transformed. Into a coyote.” Malia responded, not sure how Lydia would react.

“Oh that much was obvious, I didn’t think you ran here stark naked mid-afternoon. My question was more why are you _still_ naked? Is this your way of saying you don't want to stargaze tonight?”

“Well I'm still naked largely because I don’t have any sort of clothing at my disposal standing at your doorstep, now do I?” Malia responded, trying to match the level of sass that Lydia exuded. "And I never said I didn't want to stargaze. But this is just a little bit more important, I think."

“And why, pray tell, are you naked at my doorstep, rather than in your own house, fully clothed?” She decided to forget about their stargazing plans for the time being, knowing a full shift into her coyote was a more pressing matter.

“Well, I wanted to show you my new abilities, and if I had gone home to get dressed and then come back, I wouldn’t have any clothes to put on if I changed form again!”

“Why come to me though? I’m not exactly an expert on the supernatural.”

“Because you’re a girl? I don’t feel like flashing Scott and I don’t want to be naked around Stiles if I don’t have to.”

“Okay, you were turned back human by Scott, and you were very much naked at that time, so I doubt he would really be all that bothered by it. I do understand the Stiles thing, though,” Lydia said with an eyeroll. “I can’t imagine how childish he acts around you naked.”

“Oh it’s not that bad, really. I just don’t want to give him the wrong idea. Plus he wouldn’t exactly look at things from an unbiased perspective.” Malia crossed her arms, remembering yet again that she was still naked. “So are you gonna give me some clothes or anything?”

“Did I say I was bothered by you being naked? I just wanted to know the logic behind your choice” Lydia said coyly, obviously checking Malia out. “Besides, I don’t want my clothes dirtied up or anything by you shifting. So, go on then. Show me whatcha got,” she said with a smile. She was enjoying herself a little more than she probably should’ve.

“Okay, but if nothing happens don’t be disappointed. I’m still pretty new at this, so I don’t completely know how to do it,” Malia said, suddenly wondering if she should’ve waited to come to Lydia. She wanted to impress the girl, not make her laugh at her attempts. Malia closed her eyes and breathed deeply, listening to the sounds around them - the gentle rustling of leaves in trees, the sound of Lydia’s steady heartbeat - and tried to tune in to her coyote side. A minute or two went by, but nothing happened.

“I swear it happened before! I - I don’t know what’s wrong with it,” Malia muttered, feeling a bit embarrassed. The emotion was relatively new to her, but she realized she was standing naked in front of one of the most beautiful and popular people she’d ever met, and she wasn’t able to show off her new ability.

“I believe you, Malia. It’ll probably take some time to be able to shift at will. Come inside, we can try to figure out what happened earlier that made you shift,” Lydia offered, holding her hand out for Malia to take. She grabbed on, slowly stepping into the Martin household, feeling goosebumps rise on her skin as she realized just how nude she was.

“Do you have a towel or a robe I could borrow? As you pointed out earlier, I’m not exactly wearing anything.”

“Are you blushing?” Lydia asked with wonder. She didn’t wait for an answer, though, instead heading to her mom’s room. She held on to Malia’s hand and guided her along the hallway. “My mom is only an inch or two shorter than you, so a pair of lounge pants will probably fit,” she thought aloud. Pulling a few drawers out of a dresser, she finally found what she was looking for and handed Malia a small pile of clothes. Without waiting, she pulled them on and let out a sigh of relief when she was fully clothed once more. The two walked back to the front of the house, and Lydia pulled Malia down to sit facing her.

“What were you doing when you felt yourself shift?” Retracing the motions and thoughts of whatever happened earlier was the best place to begin, Lydia thought.

“I was just studying for the history final,” Malia offered, scrunching up her eyebrows in concentration. I was laying on my bed, flipping through the textbook when I felt a sort of heat in my body, and the next thing I knew I was a full coyote again. I wasn’t really thinking human thoughts, but I knew who I was, if that makes sense.”

“Okay, well what were you thinking about? I’m sure boring history facts didn’t spark your coyote.” Lydia had an inkling of what the answer was going to be, but she didn’t want to suggest it, lest it bring up unresolved feelings.

“I guess I was thinking about Kira, but only like in the back of my mind. Her dad teaches history class, so I guess I made that connection. We'd been having little study dates to help bring up my grade after Stiles and I broke up.” Her voice had gone a little quiet, but she understood what Lydia had done. “How’d you know?”

“I figured it had to have been something emotional that brought the coyote to the surface, and it looks like your grief over losing Kira won over your human side,” Lydia explained.

“That makes sense, in a way, but I thought I had moved on, at least enough to control myself,” Malia said. "I know I've been having problems sleeping, but this was different, it was like everything I miss about Kira suddenly washed over me.

“You have moved on, to some extent, but even a faint scent could trigger the deeper emotions you felt. Is there anything in your room that she gave you to remember her by that you haven't really seen or interacted with since she left? Or maybe something she touched a lot that would retain her scent?”

“Uh, well, we kind of did... stuff... before she left. On my bed. And I haven't been able to bring myself to study in my room before today.” Malia said, definitely blushing this time. She couldn’t make herself meet Lydia's eyes, instead staring at the pattern on the couch.

“Well, that would probably do it, plus even without her scent still lingering, your mind and body remember that she was with you in a fairly intimate way in there.” Lydia looked up at Malia and noticed her humiliation and gently placed her hand on the side of Malia’s face, guiding her eyes back up. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Malia. Sex is totally natural, between a guy and a girl, or with two girls. Or two guys,” she said with a chuckle. "Or any other combination thereof. My point is that there’s no reason to feel shame about it.”

“I don’t feel shame, really, I just haven’t ever talked about it with anyone else. I didn’t exactly have the traditional mother-daughter talk about sex, so I haven’t been able to even understand my feelings very well. Like I told you about Stiles, we had a connection in Eichen, and we both wanted something good in our shitty lives. It was fun having sex with him, especially since I was in control a lot, but it didn’t quite feel how I expected. But with Kira, everything just felt perfect. We didn’t even know what we were doing, but that didn’t matter.” Malia stopped talking, realizing how personal she had gotten, and gave Lydia a slight smile. “Sorry, you didn’t ask.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Malia, and you can always talk to me about anything. That includes sex,” she said smiling. She took hold of Malia’s hands and caressed her thumbs over the wrists. “I know you and I aren’t very much alike, but I think we should spend more time together, if that’s okay.” Now it was Lydia’s turn to blush. She’d never been so forward with another girl before, but the few close female friends she’d had in the past were close from the start. She wasn’t used to working for a friendship.

“Yeah, that would be good, especially since it’s just us girls now,” Malia said. They just looked at each other for a moment before Malia noticed that it had gotten a bit dark outside. “Shit, I told my dad I’d be home for dinner,” she said suddenly, pulling her hands back from Lydia’s quickly. The motion wasn’t meant to be rude, so she gave Lydia a smile. “I’m sorry, my dad and I have been trying to build back up to where we were before I, well, turned into a coyote all those years ago. With the end of the school year coming up, he said he wanted to spend more time together.”

“And that’s a good thing,” Lydia replied, smiling broadly. “I’m happy for you, Malia. Not just about your dad, but that your powers are stronger. We’ll keep working at it, I promise.” She stood up, leaning over to kiss Malia’s forehead, before pulling the werecoyote up and walking her to her car. “I can drive you home, if you’d like.” Malia walked to the other side and got in.

Once they pulled up to Malia’s house and she got out of the car, she suddenly stopped and looked down at herself. She turned around to dip her head back into the car. “What about your mom’s clothes? Won’t she miss them?” she asked.

“Nah, she barely wears them anyway. If you don’t want to keep them you can just wash them and return them to me at school. Now, go hang out with your dad, and tell him I said hello,” she offered, smiling. Malia smiled back and nodded. They waved and said goodnight before Lydia drove back home.


	4. Hips, your lips, they're mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lydia takes a step forward in her growing relationship with Malia

Malia made her way to school, too focused on the night before when she had showed up at Lydia’s house completely naked, to be able to sleep in. In hindsight, she felt embarrassed, but in the moment she knew she really didn’t have much to be ashamed about. She hadn’t even been thinking about the implications of her nudity, and now that Lydia had seen her naked, she realized she enjoyed the ability to be that free with someone since Kira. It had only been about a year since the pack worked together to turn Malia human, and while she had made tremendous growth, at least in her own mind, she still felt the most comfortable out in nature, not worrying about regular human life. Even with Kira, other than the one time they actually did it, she wasn’t fully naked pretty much ever. Kira was always worried about her parents walking in on one or both of them in a state of undress when they were messing around, and Malia didn’t want to cause her girlfriend to have any stress about their relationship. She also saw clothing as a sort of security blanket, grounding her to the human world. But she felt that same exhilaration of the night she and Kira were together when she was with Lydia, who seemed to reignite the fire that had gone out when Kira left. She still wasn’t sure how to navigate her feelings when it came to sexuality or romance, but her heart felt less wounded the more time she spent alone with the banshee.

“You’re here early. You feeling okay?” She heard Scott ask as she distractedly sauntered up to her locker, and she jumped at the sound of his voice. She was so lost in thought that she hadn’t sensed him coming up. She was just sort of staring at her books, not even paying attention to her surroundings.

“Oh, yeah. I couldn’t sleep, so I figured I’d head to school. Thought it might put me to sleep if nothing else could,” she said, giving Scott a smile. Before he could respond, she hurried away to the girls’ bathroom to take a breath and felt startled yet again when she noticed Lydia was there, checking to make sure her makeup was still flawless.

“Hey there! Glad to see you here on time!” Lydia said, smiling over at Malia. “I was worried you weren’t going to come in today, after what happened last night.” She walked over to Malia and put her hands on her shoulders. “Really though, are you feeling okay?”

“Why does everyone keep asking me that? I’m fine!” Malia said a little louder than intended. Lydia squinted slightly at Malia before going back over to the counter to put her lipstick and blush back in her bag.

“Let’s go,” she said, grabbing on to Malia’s arm and steering her out of the bathroom. Malia could easily pull her arm away, but she didn’t want to give up the touch of Lydia’s soft hand, holding her down to earth and keeping her mind from wandering. They made their way over to Scott’s locker, where he was hanging his backpack up and pulling out a few books. Stiles was standing next to him, watching as everyone went about their normal lives after everything that had happened with the Beast and the Dread Doctors. He didn’t even notice the girls were there until Lydia cleared her throat to get their attention. The way she was holding on to Malia was a bit strange, but Lydia, in general, was sometimes strange.

“Malia and I are taking the day off,” she announced, quirking her eyebrow up to challenge them to protest. “We’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” And before they could respond, they walked out of the school and got in Lydia’s car.

“Not that I don’t appreciate this or anything, but why are we taking the day off?” Malia asked, feeling worried. If Lydia herself was pulling Malia out of school, there had to be a good reason.

“We need to have a chat,” Lydia said matter-of-factly. “And you are way too distracted to get anything done, so there’s no harm in not making you go to class.”

“Isn’t your mom the guidance counselor though? Won’t she be mad when she finds out that not only her daughter skipped, but the dumb werecoyote did too?”

“First of all, you’re not dumb. You’re smarter than you realize, and besides, there are tons of kinds of intelligence that not everyone has. Plus, I could’ve graduated a year ago, I just like to keep an eye on my friends.” She turned to look at Malia and gave her a wink. The car stayed fairly silent after that, until they reached Lydia’s house, and they both went inside. Lydia pulled Malia by her hand, gentle enough that Malia could easily drop her arm to release the contact, and abruptly stopped dead in the middle of her room before kicking off her shoes.

“Stay here,” Lydia said quietly, and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

Malia stood in the center of the room, not sure what was going to happen, and started to look around. She had never actually been inside of this room before, but she could see that Lydia was starting to change things. She had a few stripes of paint swatches on the walls, indicating that she might be repainting soon, and there were several decorative pieces on the floor against one wall, looking like they had just been taken down. Only a few weeks had passed since the pack had gotten Lydia out of Eichen, and Malia could only imagine how much that place had changed the strawberry blonde teen. Malia had been in Eichen too, but not in the closed ward, and certainly not with a hole drilled in her head. She unconsciously shivered even just thinking about the close call she had with trepanation. Lydia had also been catatonic, which Malia couldn’t even imagine, still sometimes feeling like she wasn’t totally in tune with her body. She knew the banshee was strong, but she only just realized how much the girl had been through.

Malia decided to take off her boots and jacket, getting the feeling that they would be there for a while, and was turned away from the bathroom door, looking at the books on Lydia’s shelf, when she heard it open. She spun around to see what was happening and felt her jaw drop and eyebrows knit together in confusion. She did not expect to see Lydia Martin, resident fashionista, and genius of Beacon Hills, to be standing in front of her, only wearing a purple silk robe. She’d even taken off her makeup.

“Uh, what’s going on?” Malia asked hesitantly, not sure how to approach this situation.

“Well there’s a phrase along the lines of ‘show me yours and I’ll show you mine.’” Lydia seemed a little nervous, but she was still smiling, and staring straight into Malia’s eyes. “You didn’t ask, and I know you never would, but since I’ve seen you naked I thought it would only be fair if I were to show you me, completely naked, free of any camouflage I may present to the world. If you feel uncomfortable, we don’t have to do this. But I wanted to put you at ease so that you wouldn’t seem so stiff around me after what happened,” she said shyly.

Malia just stood there for a second, not sure how to process the situation, before Lydia moved her hands to untie the robe’s sash. Before she could make another move, Malia rushed over to her and gently placed her hands on top of Lydia’s to still her movement.

“Are you sure? You really don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” she said, looking down into Lydia’s eyes. The banshee only smiled and nodded, and moved her hands from under Malia’s to guide her to open the robe for her.

The taller girl slowly undid the knot and let the sash fall, leaving the robe open, before sliding one shoulder of the silky fabric back to kiss Lydia’s shoulder. She looked up to see Lydia’s reaction, who simply pulled Malia up to kiss her properly on the lips. When they parted, Malia gave Lydia a smile before gently sliding the robe all the way off of her.

“You’re beautiful, you know?” Malia whispered, not realizing for a second that she’d said it out loud. “Of course you do, you’re Lydia Martin,” she quickly said to cover the compliment up.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t have self-esteem issues sometimes... or that the compliment means any less,” she responded, a small smile on her face. “And you’re just as beautiful. You have no reason to feel embarrassed about your body.”

“I appreciate that, but it’s not why I was upset,” she said, finding herself sitting down on the bed. “I just feel so lost. I gained new power supposedly, but I can’t control it and I don’t know how to. I thought it was my happiness when I was thinking about going all the way with Kira, but thinking about her isn’t helping.”

“I know what you’re going through. Obviously not in the exact same way, since I never turned into a four-legged creature, but I used to not have any idea how to control or even understand my banshee powers. It was a full year or so after I was attacked that I even found out what I am. Last year I didn’t know _who_ I even was, partly because Allison was gone and we'd been through so much together, but also because I was supposed to be able to harness the power within myself to figure out the deadpool. You’ve just gotta have faith that things are going to work out.”

“How do you always have the right answer?” Malia muttered rhetorically, smiling and looking up at Lydia. “But what does this,” she gestured to Lydia’s nude body, “have to do with making me feel more comfortable with my new ability?” She put her hands on Lydia’s hips and pulled her closer.

“Well, for one thing, you could try being naked more. It might connect you more to your coyote side, being so exposed. Especially since you came to me fully nude yesterday,” Lydia said, “I was thinking we could be naked... together... this afternoon. You went full-on coyote after you remembered you and Kira together, right? From what I can tell, you were both in a state of undress when you went all the way.”

“I guess,” Malia responded hesitantly.

"Well, that's why I wanted us to be naked together, as a way for your body to somewhat mirror what it felt like being naked and natural with another girl. So how about we just nap? You’ve yawned like five times since we got here,” Lydia teased. “We would just be sleeping, and I can even get dressed again if you want,”

“I didn’t say I wanted that,” Malia said with a smile, looking up into Lydia’s eyes. “Sleep sounds great, actually.” She stood up and started to pull off her shirt before Lydia put her hands on top of hers.

“May I?” She asked before giving Malia a peck on the lips.

“Be my guest,” Malia said, putting her hands up.

Lydia grabbed at the hem of Malia’s shirt and pulled it over her head, smiling brightly when she discovered that she hadn’t worn a bra. She stood on her tippy toes to kiss Malia’s lips again, before leaning down to gently kiss her neck, then slowly making her way downward, peppering Malia’s chest and abdomen with kisses. When she got to her shorts, Lydia looked up to make sure Malia was okay. When Malia nodded, Lydia unbuttoned the jean shorts, pulled down the zipper, and hooked her thumbs into the waistband before pulling both the shorts and her underwear down. Malia stepped back, untangling her feet from the clothes, and knelt down to Lydia’s level. She gently cupped the redhead’s chin and kissed her, pulling her to stand up while still locking lips.

“If it’s okay, someday I do want to do more than just sleep with you,” she started, “But I’m also intimidated by you. Everyone loves you, and you’ve had so much more experience with other people when it comes to.. well... doing it. I’ve only been with two people, only one of whom was a girl. I  just don’t really know what to do. Or how to do anything. I think I’m just a little overwhelmed, and I’m not sure if I’m ready.” Malia said, not wanting to look Lydia in the eye.

Lydia leaned closer, placing her hand on Malia’s cheek. “That’s perfectly okay, Malia. We have all the time in the world, and even if you change your mind later, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is the here and now,” she said with a smile.

Lydia walked over to the bed, pulling back the covers. She scooted over to one side and turned to face Malia, who had followed her under the blankets and pulled them up to their shoulders. “I like being natural with you,” she said with a giggle.

“Me too,” Malia said, and gave Lydia another kiss. “Is it okay if I’m the big spoon?” She asked.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Lydia whispered. She turned over to her other side and felt Malia snuggle up behind her, wrapping her arm and leg around her body. She wiggled her feet against Malia’s and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together. Malia rested her head against Lydia’s shoulder and soon found herself falling asleep too, dreaming of the raven-haired kitsune that had made Malia start to question who in life she liked.


	5. Kiss me with adventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Malia reveals something to her dad and Lydia, and takes a step forward in her coyote abilities.

After napping together in the nude, the pair fell into the habit of sleeping in the same manner at night; Lydia frequently told her mom she would be staying the night at Malia’s house to tutor her, when in reality they barely opened their textbooks. They still hadn’t done more than make out, but they spent the night free of clothing, sometimes talking, other times enjoying the silence of each other’s company. It had been a couple of weeks since the day that Lydia decided to bare all to Malia, and while they both became more comfortable around one another in that time, she wasn’t sure where they were going from here. She was perfectly content with the way that things were, but she could sense worry in Malia, like she was still wrestling with herself about something.

They were facing each other, hands intertwined, and Lydia could have sworn that Malia was asleep if it weren’t for her thumbs rubbing circles onto Lydia’s hands and the occasional flutter of her eyelashes. She was about to ask what was on Malia’s mind when there was a sudden knock on the door, startling the girls. Henry didn’t wait for a response before opening the door and leaning his head in, eyes searching the room for them.

“You two doing okay? I just started -” he began, before realizing they were under the covers, only their heads visible, both sporting a deer-in-headlights expression. “Oh god, I’m so sorry. Umm, just come to the kitchen when you’re ready, okay?” Neither of them had a chance to say anything before he closed the door, almost slamming it in embarrassment.

Lydia sat up, pulling the comforter up with her, and ran a hand through her hair, her face stuck in a silent gasp. She didn’t even know what to say, how to comfort Malia, having never been in such a situation before. Jackson’s parents always gave them a lot of freedom and privacy, and her own parents weren’t home enough to notice her various paramours. She turned to look at Malia, who had her head buried in her hands. Lydia realized that Malia probably heard her dad approaching the room, but she was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn’t pay any attention to it.

“Hey, it’s okay. Your dad is pretty cool, I’m sure he’s not going to be upset or anything. And it’s not like we were doing anything besides resting.” Lydia tried to reassure Malia.

“Yeah, I’m sure you’re right,” Malia responded half-heartedly. She got up and handed Lydia her shirt before pulling on a pair of shorts and an oversized tee. Lydia walked on her knees over to the edge of the bed before stepping off, leaning over to grab the pair of pajama pants she’d brought with her. Malia started to walk toward the door before Lydia grabbed her wrist, pulling her back. She didn’t say anything, just held her hand on Malia’s cheek and gave her a smile. Malia squeezed her hand before leading her out with her to the kitchen. The smell of lasagna in the oven wafted over to them as they got closer, and noticed Henry sitting at the table with his back to the hallway, his head in his hands. Lydia couldn’t help but notice that Malia probably picked up that habit from him.

“Hey, dad,” Malia muttered sheepishly.

“Hi, Mr. Tate,” Lydia said, trying to put some confidence into her voice. “We’re super sorry about that.” She started to say they meant to lock the door but thought that might not sound very good to the father of the girl she’d been naked with almost every night for the past few weeks.

“Hello girls,” he responded as he pulled his head up, not wanting to actually look at them. He never really imagined having this sort of awkward discussion, as Malia stayed at the Stilinski kid’s house when they were together, and he hadn’t even thought she might get into the same sort of situations with another girl.

They made their way to the table, and Lydia sat down, thinking Malia would sit on the other side of the table as she usually did when they all had dinner together, but instead she kept her hand firmly laced together with Lydia’s, sitting down next to her. Lydia squeezed her hand, letting Malia know that she appreciated the gesture.

“So, I suppose this means you’re, ahem, together?” He asked, hesitation seeping out. He finally looked up at Malia, waiting for an answer. She stared at the table for a minute, trying to stay calm. She didn’t look like she was going to be speaking anytime soon, so Lydia thought she should take initiative instead of sitting there awkwardly. She was one half of this equation, after all.

“Not strictly speaking, no,” she started, not sure exactly how to explain the situation. They had never talked about a relationship or making anything official. They were just study buddies who happened to get naked more often than not.

“‘Not strictly speaking’? What does that even mean?” There was no anger in his voice, just confusion.

“Well - “ Lydia started.

“Actually, Lydia, I was going to ask you if you wanted to be my girlfriend tonight. But, well, it got complicated,” Malia said, not looking up. Barely a few seconds go by before Lydia speaks again.

“Of course I do, nothing would make me happier,” she said as she leaned her head against Malia’s shoulder. Silence followed that statement, the air still full of awkward and uncomfortable energy.

“That’s fine and all, girls, I’m happy for you, I’m just a bit confused,” Henry said, his brows scrunched together. “You were with the Stilinski boy for a few months before y’all broke up and you go another couple of months of no indication about liking anyone, and now I find you in bed with a girl. Does that mean you don’t like guys anymore?”

“It doesn’t really work like that, at least not for me. I don’t really think about liking someone based on their gender, I just know when I feel attraction. Stiles helped bring me back, and he was there for me during a dark time at Eichen House, and we stayed together after that experience. But Kira, our friend who left a little while ago, you remember her? We were actually dating, and I’m pretty sure I was in love with her. I still might be, if I’m honest with myself. We had a special night before she left, she couldn’t bare to leave without making a few memories. And then Lydia...” she squeezed the redhead’s hand as she spoke, turning to face her and look in those beautiful green eyes, “Lydia here has helped me move past the hurt of losing Kira before I was able to tell her exactly how I felt. And she’s helped me feel more comfortable being myself than anyone else has.” She smiled, still feeling tense about the situation as a whole, but relieved to get it off her chest. “So if you want a straightforward answer about who I like, based on the research I’ve done, I’d say that I’m pansexual.” She turned to face her dad this time, not sure how he would take it. His face was fairly unreadable, but he didn’t look upset.

“I’m sorry I never asked before. You were so young when I thought I lost you, and when you came back, you spent so much time around your friends that I didn’t think this was something we needed to talk about. I'm sorry about Kira, I wish you would've mentioned you were dating someone new, but I’m so proud of you for being honest with me.” Henry just looked at Malia, smiling and taking in the fact that his daughter was so mature. A second later, his face looked alarmed, and for a moment Malia was worried he’d somehow changed his mind.

“The lasagna!” Henry exclaimed, jumping up and going over to the oven. He opened the door and saw that the top was _just_ brown enough, almost starting to burn. He grabbed a set of oven mitts and pulled it out, turning off the oven and setting the dish down on the cooling pad on the table. He smiled apologetically at the girls as he sat back down, this time seated across from them. He reached his hand out to Lydia’s free arm, which had been sitting relaxed on the table, and squeezed it.

“Thank you. I know I thanked you and your other friends when Malia was first brought back to me, but I want to thank you for more than that. I know how much she adores all of you, and now with the sudden development of you being her girlfriend, thank you for being there for her. I know I’m not the best at this emotional stuff, but I’m happy for you two.” Lydia smiled in response. He reached his other hand out to Malia, who took it gingerly. “Now how about some dinner?”

* * *

 “Well, that went better than expected,” Malia said. After dinner, they had returned to her room and were now sitting on the bed across from one another, holding hands.

“Did you think your dad wouldn’t be supportive?” Lydia asked. She hadn’t interacted with Henry enough to have much of a gauge for how welcoming he was to Malia’s announcement.

“Oh, no, I wasn't worried about that. I was scared you wouldn’t want to date me,” Malia said, hesitant to look up at Lydia. She felt silly for saying it, but she wasn’t sure until she’d had the courage to ask about being girlfriends if Lydia was even interested in girls, especially her, someone who was not an outwardly feminine person.

Lydia wasn’t sure how to take that, whether it was because Malia couldn’t quite determine her feelings or because Lydia herself wasn’t the best at always expressing them. Regardless, she gently raised Malia’s chin with a brush of her hand and kissed her softly.

“I’m sorry I didn’t make it more obvious that I’m totally into you, I didn’t want to scare you off. The rest of the pack knows I’m bisexual, but I realize I didn’t make an effort to make sure you knew you’d become the focus of my feelings lately. And I’m proud of you, too. I realize I didn’t say it earlier, but I wanted that moment to be between you and your dad. I’m so proud of you for being comfortable telling us, and even more proud that you did research!” She winked as she said that and nudged Malia’s arm, knowing she isn’t usually one for such things as research, especially in situations that didn’t pertain to school.

“Tease all you like, but it was hard! I almost didn’t tell you guys, but I figured the situation was already awkward, so it wouldn’t hurt to add on to it. Speaking of awkward, though, I want to try it tonight.” Her eyes lit up as she said this, and Lydia wasn’t sure what exactly _it_ was as her eyebrows slowly rose.

“Wanna elaborate? I mean, I’m game for whatever, I’d just like to know ahead of time what I’m getting into.”

“How about we just go for a drive and see what happens?” Malia asked, already getting up and pulling Lydia along with her. The question didn’t clear anything up, but Lydia figured she’d find out soon enough.

They pulled on their shoes after changing out of their pajamas and snuck out. Malia was sure her dad wouldn’t mind them leaving, but she didn’t know for sure when they’d be back and wanted to avoid further questions. She left her door closed so that he’d just think they were in there, and now that they were official she wouldn’t have to worry about him surprising them again. Malia pulled Lydia to her car and even opened the door for her. Lydia didn’t say anything, just raised her brows as a smile crept onto her face. They drove for a while until reaching Lookout Point.

“Is this the mystery destination?” Lydia asked as Malia turned off the ignition.

“Obviously,” Malia responded, rolling her eyes playfully. She got out and helped Lydia out of the car. “Okay, so I’m going to try a full shift. I think, maybe, since I sort of cleared my head by telling two of the most important people in my life about my sexuality and asked a gorgeous girl to be my girlfriend, I might be in the right headspace to do it. And I wanted to do it somewhere I wouldn’t have to worry about being seen, which rules out doing it near my house.” Without waiting for a response, she pulled off her shirt, and Lydia immediately jumped forward, her eyes going wide.

“Why the stripping in the middle of the woods?” She asked, a smile creeping onto her face. “Not that I’m complaining, just asking.”

“When it happened last time, I lost my clothes. I figured a safe way to make sure that doesn’t happen again is to just take them off since you can hold on to them for me.”

“Oh, so I’ve been relegated to the ‘clothes keeper’ role.” Lydia noted.

“Of course not, you’ve been relegated to the ‘hot girlfriend and hot body admirer’ role,” Malia said with a wink and a smile. At that, she kicked off her shoes and pulled off the rest of her clothes, stepping closer to Lydia to hand her the pile of clothing and kiss her. “And maybe more roles later, if you’re up for it,” she whispered into Lydia’s ear. She didn’t look to realize that she’d made Lydia blush, a feat not easily accomplished. Instead, she turned to face the moon, closing her eyes and breathing deeply.

Malia could feel the pull of the moon, calling on her wild side, the coyote at heart. She felt the excited and frantic energy of the hours leading up to now, the raw emotions of revealing such a personal and intimate part of herself. She felt the grounding sorrow over Kira in her gut, but it blossomed into warmth and enthusiasm as she thought of her future with Lydia, their relationship finally official, and only just beginning. She imagined Lydia’s warm embrace and her soft skin and strength. Opening her eyes, Malia found herself much closer to the ground, and suddenly much less aware of her state of being. She felt emotions, but not the reasons behind them. Hearing a sniffle behind her, she turned to see Lydia on her knees, tears in her eyes.

“You did it! Oh my god, Malia. You really did it!” Her face was beaming, a couple of tears running down her cheek, a hand over her heart. She saw the pile of clothes on the ground - Lydia must have dropped them when she collapsed. Lydia reached her hand out to the coyote in front of her, its eyes glowing a beautiful blue. Malia pushed her face forward, nuzzling Lydia’s hand. She padded forward to close the gap between them and laid her head on Lydia’s lap while Lydia gently stroked her fur. Lydia leaned down and pressed a kiss to Malia’s snout.

“You’re beautiful,” she whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two notes - first, I'll always see Henry Tate as Malia's dad because she chose the Tate name, and he has supported and loved her since she was a baby and later returned as a human to him. I'm all for a Peter redemption and don't mind him and Malia bonding, but he's no longer her "dad" in the sense of a supportive parental figure. Second, I really didn't know how to approach writing Malia's shift into her new coyote form, so I apologize if that part is not written very well!


	6. But I'm sick of hiding my heartbeat when the stars move on

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the exciting developments in her new relationship, Malia remembers more from her time with Kira and learns a little about Lydia and Allison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The flashback scene takes place the night of 403, as a sort of time reference. And the name I use for Allison is the one on that list of names that Will Wallace released last year. I don't personally necessarily accept all of those names as canon, but I like a few of them.

There was no other word to describe how she felt, except _comfortable_. Sounds were even more pronounced, the leaves bristling on the ground and the wind gently soaring through the trees.

She could distinctly hear Lydia’s steady heart rate and slow breathing. She could feel the warmth of the banshee’s hands still in her fur, no longer grasped tightly as she had loosened her grip in her sleep. The girl’s head rested on Malia’s side, her body lain down around Malia’s coyote form, roughly resembling how a hug would look.

After collapsing down to the ground out of the beauty and pride she felt for Malia, the coyote had walked over to her, nuzzling her snout to Lydia, making her smile. After Lydia began to adjust to seeing Malia’s new shape, she sat down properly and watched as Malia explored, trotting into the woods behind them, experimenting with running and absorbing her new heightened senses. Lydia couldn’t help but compare Malia’s coyote form with Derek’s wolf, as they were the only two fully shifted werecreatures she’d encountered. Derek’s wolf had been midnight black, his blue eyes complementing the dark fur. Malia’s coyote, on the other hand, was a mixture of browns and tans, almost tawny in color. Her eyes shone brilliantly, a stark contrast to the color of her coat. Lydia was still in awe, a feat not easily accomplished, when she realized how tired she was getting.

It had started to become a habit for the two girls, meeting up and talking later in the day, late enough that they more often than not woke up with each other the next day. It wasn’t that they were hiding what they were doing, but now that they were official as of a few hours prior, Lydia was determined to be with Malia all day, not just all night. She stifled another yawn as she thought this, but Malia saw right through her. She came back from where she’d been exploring, mouth open in a smile of sorts, nudging Lydia’s arm until she lifted it, allowing Malia to scoot underneath and lay down, pulling the girl down with her. She stared at Lydia, who had collapsed into a fit of giggles as Malia rolled over onto her side, too overcome with tiredness and the slight ridiculousness of the situation. After all, when Lydia had woken up that morning, she never would have expected that she’d be ending the day with a full-blown coyote, especially a coyote that was now her girlfriend. She calmed down, still smiling when she eventually fell asleep, and felt Malia kiss her with a small lick of her tongue. As she drifted off, she couldn’t help but think this whole coyote thing would take some getting used to.

Hearing the sound of Lydia calm down, her breathing indicating her level of slumber, made Malia feel a mixture of emotions. She was still incredibly happy that Lydia had agreed to date her, but she was also still a little jittery about having come out to her dad, at least in terms of her sexuality. It was also the first time all day that she was practically alone, left to think in the quiet of her own mind. The day itself had been a good one, but the closer she got to Lydia, the more guilty she felt about Kira. She wanted to be with Lydia, had the guts to ask her to be her girlfriend, and she was more than happy with that. But she never really got to tell Kira that she was in love with her, never got to experience any of this with the first person she truly fell for. Her eyes drifted up to the sky above, the stars glittering and twinkling, and as Malia felt her own body betraying her with exhaustion, she thought back to what she considered her first date with the kitsune.

_“Where are we going?” Kira inquired, her hand on Malia’s arm that rested on the gear stick._

_“You’ll see,” she answered mysteriously, a twinkle in her eye and a smirk on her lips. She’d asked Kira to come to her house for help with school stuff when they were on the stands during lacrosse practice earlier that day, but instead of actually working she pulled Kira out to her car, saying there was somewhere else they needed to go. Kira went along, figuring that they might be going to the library or somewhere else to study. It had been about twenty minutes since they left, and as far as Kira could tell they were simply driving through the preserve. Right as she was going to ask how long it would take to reach their destination, she noticed the trees clearing in front of them, cutting open to a clear view of Beacon Hills below them._

_“Lookout Point?” Kira asked, not sure why they’d come here._

_“Have you been here before?” Malia responded, worry lacing her voice. She had wanted this to be a special evening._

_“No, I’ve just heard about it. Have you?”_

_“A couple of times.” She still gave no clues as to the reasoning behind coming here, but she killed the ignition, reaching into the back seat for a mysterious basket before getting out of the car. She went around to Kira’s side and pulled open her door. “Coming?” She asked with a smile on her face, holding out her hand for her now-unbuckled companion. Kira took it, giving her a squeeze._

_Malia led her close to the edge before kneeling down, taking the top off of the basket to reveal a blanket folded up. She set the basket down, pulling out the blanket and laid it down on the smooth cliff, patting it a couple of times for Kira to sit down. She turned back to the basket, pulling out a few plastic containers holding sushi and two sets of chopsticks. Before she had a chance to say anything, she heard a little giggle sound that was quickly stifled behind a hand. Her face suddenly felt warm in embarrassment and she didn’t know if she could face Kira. She shook her head slightly and sat down, sighing before looking back up to Kira, not quite meeting her eyes._

_“I, uh, thought we could have some dinner. I don’t know how to cook and didn’t want to try to get food delivered all the way out here, so I just picked these up from the grocery store this morning. I hope that’s okay.” She picked up the two packages, one in each hand. “I know it’s silly, you don’t have to have any if you don’t want. I just wanted to surprise you.”_

_Kira knelt down, putting a hand on one of the containers, the other on Malia’s cheek, cupping her face and pulling it up to eye level._

_“This is wonderful, and I am definitely surprised. And what do you know, I love a good California roll,” she said, smiling. “Thank you for this, for everything.”_

_“Why’d you laugh, though?” Malia asked, still uncertain about whether or not she’d disappointed Kira._

_“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have. I was just worried that something was wrong, but when you pulled out the sushi I was completely taken aback, and my awkward self didn’t know how else to respond. Really, I love this.”_

_“If you say so,” Malia said, her smile slowly returning._

_The pair ate the food in relative silence, both of them hungry and unsure of what to say. They hadn’t had time alone since the dance in the desert, and Malia’s heart had been aching ever since then, wondering if she should have said or done something besides dancing. Feeling that close to Kira was the most exciting thing she’d ever experienced, her heart racing in exhilaration. Kira was a puzzle, cute and dorky yet badass and fierce at the same time. Malia was in awe of her._

_Once they finished eating, Malia offered to take Kira’s trash, putting it back into the basket to prevent it from blowing away. She sat back down, studying Kira for a moment before pulling off her jacket and leaning back to lay down._

_“I didn’t really have any pillows I could bring, but you can use my jacket,” she said as she held it up. She couldn't find it in her to actually make eye contact with Kira, too nervous to do so. "The ground’s not too bad, so I'm fine without it.”_

_Kira grabbed the jacket without a word, and Malia assumed she’d lay down next to her. She was surprised when she felt a hand smooth her hair down._

_“Why don’t you use your jacket, and I’ll lay on you?” Kira asked, one hand clasping the hoodie while the other supported Malia’s neck as she slid the piece of clothing under her head. Malia felt frozen where she was, surprised by Kira’s words, when she heard a few confusing footsteps that sounded like they were retreating. Malia turned her head to see Kira kneeling down, angling herself so that she could rest her head on Malia’s abdomen. Once she was laying down as well, the raven-haired girl turned her face so that Malia could see it._

_“Is this okay?” she asked, uncertainty in her voice._

_“Definitely,” Malia managed. She tentatively raised her hand to Kira’s head, pulling a stray hair back to the rest, gently running her hands through Kira's hair._

_“Is this okay?” she asked back, only a little serious, a smile tugging at her lips._

_“Definitely,” Kira responded with a giggle. “Can I ask a question though?”_

_“Of course.”_

_“Why me? Why did you want to come out here with me?” Malia could hear a slight uptick in Kira’s heart rate, indicating how nervous she was._

_“I just thought we could use some alone time. We really haven’t been able to have any since Mexico. Us new girls gotta stick together after all,” she said quietly. I’m also crazy for you, but I don’t know how to say it without scaring you off, she thought to herself._

_“Oh,” was Kira’s response._

_Silence filled the space around them, and Malia couldn’t tell if Kira was disappointed or bored, if she really didn’t want to be there._

_“The stars are beautiful tonight,” Kira remarked._

_“Yeah, they are,” Malia said, grateful for the silence to be interrupted._

_“You know what else is beautiful?” Kira asked, and Malia had no idea what to expect. She was glad that Kira was talking, since she herself didn’t know what to say, but was nervous for what Kira’s response would be._

_“What?” She finally asked._

_“You,” Kira said, her voice barely audible, and for a second Malia wasn’t even sure she’d heard correctly. Her hand paused its motion on Kira’s head and she looked down at her._

_“What?” She repeated. Kira chuckled a little, nervousness coming off of her in waves._

_“I said, 'you'. As in you’re beautiful.” She finally managed to look at Malia, turning her body and curling up with her so that she could fully face her, head still resting on Malia's stomach with her hand tangled up in Kira's hair. “You’re beautiful, Malia,” she said with a heartfelt smile._

When Malia woke up, she realized she had shifted back to human in her sleep. She started to wonder how that had happened when she remembered the dream she was having. The memory.

“You okay?” Lydia asked, head on Malia’s abdomen as if she’d just shifted and woke her up.

“Yeah, I guess,” Malia said, her face scrunched up in pain.

“Okay, I’m going to be blunt and say I'm pretty sure that’s a lie,” she teased, concern in her voice. “You can talk to me, sweetheart.” Once upon a time, that pet name would have been meant in a sarcastic or demeaning manner, such as when Malia had her claws out during class. Now, though, she knew it was meant earnestly.

“I _am_ okay, now that I have you,” Malia tried again. “I just had a bad dream. Or, rather, a good dream that made me feel bad to have.” When Lydia’s face morphed into confusion, Malia decided to expand on what she meant. “I was remembering when Kira and I came out here when we had our first date. I brought a blanket for us to sit on and we ate sushi before laying back to look at the stars. It was awkward and I didn’t know what to say or do. But then she went and called me beautiful, something nobody had ever done before,” she explained, her voice drifting off.

“Malia, nobody has a perfect first date. That actually sounds really lovely,” Lydia said. She had a hesitant smile on her face that made Malia worry.

“Oh my god, Lydia, I’m sorry. I just realized that we’re together now and I _still_ can’t shut up about my unrequited love. I’m sorry,” she said again. At that, Lydia got up to stand, pulling Malia up with her. She looped her arms under Malia’s, holding her in a tight hug. She kissed Malia’s shoulder before leaning back to see her face again.

“You have absolutely no reason to apologize,” she started. When Malia started to speak again, she placed a finger over her lips to stop her. “First of all, Kira was your first love, and that’s big. I was bent up on Jackson for almost a year after he left before I considered myself having moved on. Second, the love you have for Kira is what helped trigger your shift to begin with, and that is possibly even bigger. I’m not jealous or upset when you talk about her. I promise.” She removed her finger from Malia’s mouth and got up on her tippy toes to kiss Malia before pulling away. She whined a little at the loss, but didn’t argue with what Lydia had said.

“Now, I think you should maybe get dressed. I’m perfectly happy staring at your awesome body, but I’d rather you not get in trouble for public indecency,” she said with a wink. She turned back around to where the pile of clothes had been left and picked them up. Instead of handing them to Malia, however, she decided to help her get dressed again, which greatly amused the werecoyote.

“You do realize this would go a little quicker if you just let me do it?” She asked, a smile pulling its way to the surface.

“Who said anything about quick? Besides, this gives me an excuse to get up close and personal with you,” Lydia said. After a few more minutes of maneuvering and sporadic kisses, Malia was fully dressed again and Lydia pulled her down to sit.

“Do you think you might still want to learn about the constellations and the stars? I still think it would help you feel connected to Kira, even though she’s far away in the desert.” The sun was beginning to rise, evidenced by the subtle lightening of the sky around them. Lydia leaned to rest her head on Malia’s shoulder and joined their hands together in their laps.

“Actually, I do. But how do you even know about them? I wouldn’t have pegged you for one with the patience to stare at the sky.”

“Well, I used to not. I never even really thought about it. But after Allison died...” Lydia started, though her voice was quiet and a little shaky. She heaved a heavy sigh and pulled Malia's hand up to press a kiss to it before continuing. “Allison’s first name was really Celestine, though she would’ve killed anyone who mentioned it. I only know because a few of her elementary school papers still used that name, and I saw them when I was helping her move into the apartment she shared with her dad. Anyway, it means ‘heavenly’. I had a really hard time after she died, as I’ve mentioned before, but one thing I didn’t tell you about was that one of my coping techniques was to view her death as her returning to the stars and the heavens, like coming full circle in the path of life. We’re all made of stardust, everything around us is. So when someone passes on, when they die, they return to the stars they came from. Silly, I know, but it helped. And thus, I learned about the stars and constellations as a way to stay connected to her, to feel like she was still a part of my life. There's also this saying that only in darkness can you truly see the light. And Allison passing away was the darkest time for us all, but in it I found the beauty of the stars, always shining bright above us.” She didn’t say any more, but Malia could feel a soft wetness on her shoulder, tears that had run down Lydia’s face. Lydia raised a hand to wipe them away and sniffled a little.

“I’m sorry,” Malia muttered, not sure what else could be said.

“Me too,” Lydia responded. “But I honor her by remembering her as she was - perfectly imperfect. And that’s how we, how you, can honor Kira.” She felt Malia nod in agreement and squeezed her hand.

The two sat in silence for a while more, until the sun was up and they could see the town below lighting up, indicating a bright new day just beginning.


	7. Go (please stay)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Malia finally remembers her special night with Kira

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first time writing a sex scene, so I hope I did at least a halfway decent job.
> 
> You can find me at gaycoyotes.tumblr.com

Once the sun was high enough for the day to officially start, Malia pulled Lydia up and they returned to the car. They were still a bit tired from the long night before, but having napped a bit helped. The car was full of silence, but rather than the uncomfortable air and tension that filled it just a few weeks ago, there was a comfortable warmth between the two girls. Malia drove with her left hand, her right resting on the gear shift with Lydia leaning against her, her legs curled up into the seat and her shoes kicked off into the floorboard. Smiles played on their faces as they thought of the progress of their relationship, from Malia being the new girl who’d been a coyote for eight years and originally not getting along with Lydia, to now, girlfriends who were brought together by unexpected circumstances, growing out of the pain of the past year.

As Malia pulled up to her house, she noticed that her dad’s car was gone, and she sighed in relief. Last night had been awkward enough as it was that she was grateful to avoid further awkwardness by sneaking back in with her new girlfriend. Feeling less of a need to rush back in, she turned off the ignition and looked over at Lydia, smiling sheepishly.

“Hi there,” she said with a smirk.

“Hi back. You okay?” Lydia asked, only a sliver of worry evident in her voice.

“Course. I got you, don’t I?” Malia responded, not really answering the question. “I’m just thinking about how Scott and Stiles are going to take us being together. I never really came out to them, and Kira and I were on down-low so it’s not like they knew as much then. Everyone sort of knew we were together, but nobody talked about it.”

“We don’t have to tell them anything until you’re ready, babe. I don’t want to push you or make you feel like you ever have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.” Lydia gently ran her hand along Malia’s arm as she talked, hoping it would be a comforting gesture.

“I know you wouldn’t, but I want to do things right this time. I want to do right by Kira. Maybe if we were more vocal about our relationship I would be able to get over her easier, like if other people understood why I’m feeling what I do. I want the world to know who I am now, who we are,” Malia said with a sad smile, turning to look at Lydia. She leaned down to give her a kiss before pulling away. “But maybe we can wait a little while longer, so that I can hopefully have more control over my shift and tell them about both things at once, since they are a bit connected. For now, though, we should probably get ready for school. I wouldn’t want my dad to find out that I didn’t show up the day after we got together. He might start making assumptions about us and not like you as much as he does now,” she finished and booped Lydia on the nose with her free hand.

When the girls got out of the car, Lydia wrapped her arms around one of Malia’s, pulling her closer and once again leaning her head on Malia’s shoulder as they walked. She felt comfort around Malia, not feeling a need to impress her as she did with most other people. Malia took her as she was, never expecting anything else, and seemed happy to just be around her. She could never have predicted how close they had become, and she felt herself smile as she realized that Malia was now her girlfriend, the first she had. Sure, Lydia had some experience with women, having experimented sexually with a few strangers, in addition to Allison, but she’d never found a girl who wanted to actually _be_ with her, to be in a relationship with. Allison was the closest she had gotten, but they just messed around while studying on occasion, as Allison was dating Scott for a while before growing closer to Isaac, and Lydia was perfectly fine with that arrangement. She hadn’t wanted to date for so long after Jackson, and while she found hope again with Aiden, she was cautious in affairs of the heart. Losing him just after she lost her best friend was so much worse than she could’ve anticipated, but she knew she was strong and could persevere. The happiness she felt with Malia came as a surprise, knowing how antagonistic she was with her when they first met, and not having felt the initial sexual attraction that had precipitated all of her precious romantic partners.

“Still with me?” She heard Malia ask. Lydia looked up at her and realized she must’ve been daydreaming.

“Yeah, sorry,” she said with a smile. “Just thinking about us. Actually, I think I’m in need of a shower after sleeping in the woods last night. Can I use yours?”

“You don’t even need to ask,” Malia said. “I’ll just get dressed and start some coffee for us.”

* * *

 

An hour later, and both girls were dressed and ready for the day ahead of them. Lydia had offered to drive them to school since Malia was awake for more of the night, and Malia made no objections. They didn’t appear any different to the others, especially considering the fact that the last Scott and Stiles had seen them, Lydia was pulling Malia along with her.

“There you are, thought you might be skipping school again. You guys okay?” Scott asked as Lydia dropped Malia off at her locker.

“Hey, I am committed to graduating on time with you guys, and that means being here as much as possible,” Malia said, her tone playful. “And we’re perfectly fine, just dealing with some, uh, girl stuff.” She stifled a laugh at that, knowing from experience that boys instantly tried to distance themselves from girls when they mentioned that very broad phrase.

“Oh, great, I’m uh glad that you have someone to help with that,” Scott said, trying to hide the fact that his face was getting red. Just then, Stiles walked up to the pair and put a hand on each of their shoulders, wiggling in between them.

“What’re we talking about that’s got Scotty boy all flustered?” He asked.

“Girl stuff,” Scott managed, letting out a laugh before turning to look at Stiles. The latter’s face instantly dropped.

“Well, I think it’s been very much established that that’s not really my area of expertise,” he said before patting their shoulders once more and promptly turning back around and walking away as fast as he could. Scott and Malia broke out laughing, remembering the conversation a year ago in which Stiles brought up said ‘girl stuff’ to the pack and demanded that one of the other females help Malia out. She didn’t see what the problem was then, not having much of a filter yet for what was considered appropriate, and had asked Stiles about period problems when they finished making out, horrifying him.

“Really, though, I am glad that Lydia has been helpful to you,” Scott said as he calmed back down. He gave Malia a smile and a little wave as he closed his locker and turned to head to class.

 _You have no idea,_ Malia thought to herself, not able to stop from smiling broadly. She too headed to class, and the rest of the school day went by much more uneventfully than it had started. After their last class of the day, economics, Malia and Lydia returned back to the redhead’s car.

“So, where to?” Lydia asked after she started the car.

“Can you actually drop me off at my place?” Malia asked, sensing the question that would follow.

“Sure, do you just want me to just drop you off?” Lydia asked as she pulled out of the parking lot. The girls hadn’t spent a night completely apart yet, and Lydia worried something had changed since that morning. Malia took a while to respond, and they were almost at her house when she finally spoke up.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind. I think my dad and I should have some one-on-one time, but I’ll text you later?” She leaned over to give Lydia a kiss and started to pull away before stretching up to place a kiss on her forehead. Lydia smiled back and nodded. Malia got out of the car and watched as Lydia pulled away, giving her a wave when she noticed her look back in the rearview mirror.

The afternoon and evening went fairly uneventfully, with Malia studying a bit for the econ test coming up and eating dinner with her dad. Henry was casual, he didn’t ask questions about Lydia like Malia had expected, and he seemed relieved that it was just the two of them that night. They chatted about school and Malia’s grades, and then about Henry’s job. She wondered what he was thinking when he asked about her friends, knowing he found Lydia and her together unexpected, but she knew he loved her regardless of her life choices. She wondered, for the thousandth time it felt, how he would take the news of her being a coyote, but she knew that even if she were to ever tell him, she would need to be in absolute control. Her thought process was interrupted when she realized they were finished eating and that Henry had started to take care of the mess from dinner.

“You go watch TV or something, take the night off. I’ll take care of this,” she said as she got up from the table. Henry looked at her strangely for a second before smiling and shaking his head, as though she were a puzzle he would never figure out. He thanked her before leaving her to her own devices.

After cleaning up the dishes, Malia texted Lydia that she decided to turn in early, a bundle of emotions running through her as she breathed deeply, preparing the memory she was going to try to intentionally call up. She took a quick shower while she waited, letting the heat and steam calm her down, and changed into her pajamas before returning to her room. She and Lydia had decided that since Henry knew they were dating, they should try to stay clothed while they were at Malia’s house, so as to keep his parental trust. When she got to her room, Lydia was just setting down her bag, and she smiled when she saw Malia.

“Is something wrong?” She asked when she saw her face in the light. Malia felt a few tears in her eyes and looked up, trying not to cry. It wouldn’t do to let the emotions flood out before she conducted her experiment.

“Yeah. Um, I decided that I should try to remember Kira and I’s night. Like, fully remember everything that happened? That way maybe my mind will let me move completely past it. Yesterday when I was dreaming of her, the emotions I was feeling made me shift back to human even though I didn’t realize it, so I want to try and get the particularly poignant memories out of the way so that I can remember her in happiness too, y’know?” Her eyes still threatened to overflow with tears, but she really didn’t want to cry before the memory itself played through.

“That could work,” Lydia said, walking forward to pull Malia into a hug. “Instead of letting your subconscious attack you with what _it_ wants to remember, _when_ it wants to remember, you could try and force it to do what _you_ want. If you can force yourself to sort of flush out the strongest memories so that you’re feeling all of the emotions when you’re aware, that could lead to better control.”

Malia nodded in response, not sure if there was much she could say as a reply. While Lydia changed into her pajamas, Malia went ahead and crawled onto the bed, leaving the blanket pulled down for Lydia to join her. Once she did, she kissed Malia’s forehead before turning around, letting Malia hold her in their familiar positions. Before she knew it, Malia was asleep.

_A knock resounded on her door, startling her. Malia had been pacing in her room for a while now, not able to sleep with the mess of emotions running through her head. She shifted her gaze up at the wooden frame and slowly walked over to it, pulling the door open. When she saw Kira standing there, she couldn’t help but narrow her eyes and turn around, leaving the door open for her to enter if she wanted to. Malia ran her hands over her face and through her hair, taking in a shuddering breath before turning back to face Kira again._

_“I’m not really in the mood to talk, so if that’s what you’re here for you can leave,” she said, her voice shakier and quieter than she’d intended._

_“I didn’t come here to talk.” Kira’s face was unreadable, her forehead scrunched up but Malia couldn’t tell if it was from hurt or confusion._

_“Then why did you come? You already made it clear that you’re leaving.” Her tone was bitter, harsh even to her ears._

_“You know why I have to leave, Malia. I know you do, you just don’t like it. I don’t like it either, but it’s what has to be done. I made a deal with the Skinwalkers and I’m going to hold myself to it. You would do the same if you were in my position.” Kira was still standing there in the doorway, her hands fiddling with each other as they often did when she was trying to control her emotions._

_“You said you weren’t here to talk, so why are you here?” Malia asked again. “I really can’t talk about this anymore, not right now. You gave me your little goodbye spiel and a farewell kiss already. So what are you doing here now?”_

_“I needed to see you one last time, before I leave for good. I need you to remember me as more than the girl who left, Malia. You’re the only one I want to remember me like this. And I need to you to realize that I’m just as hurt, if not moreso, for making the choice to leave.”_

_“That’s where you’re wrong, Kira, at least you get to make a choice. I don’t. Scott didn’t. You are making the choice and the rest of us have to live with it, we have to live without you.” Tears were welling up in her eyes and she didn’t have the energy to hide them. “You’re still talking, so either stop it or leave,” she said as she turned away again. They both knew her anger was just a weak attempt at disguising her sadness, but neither one of them was going to call her out on it. She closed her eyes and ducked her head before hearing the door close. Malia heaved a sigh and turned back around, suddenly surprised by the feeling of Kira placing her hands on her face._

_She opened her eyes to see Kira standing in front of her and sniffled when she wiped the tears away. Kira gave her a little smile before pulling Malia’s face down gently, kissing her softly. Malia let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding before kissing back, more aggressive, as though trying to claim Kira’s mouth. Her hands went to Kira’s shirt, trying to quickly undo the buttons, but her hands betrayed her, fumbling a little, showing her nervousness. After a few more tries, the shirt finally came off, but before Malia could move on to the bra, she felt Kira’s hands drift to the hem of her own shirt, tugging it up._

_“Your turn,” Kira whispered against Malia’s lips, and Malia raised her arms so it could be pulled off. Kira’s arms snaked around her torso as she returned to kissing her, unhooking her bra. She pulled away to let Malia take the bra the rest of the way off, removing her own as she watched. Her lips twitched up into a smile and she leaned forward again, gently running her hands up Malia’s bare sides as she stood tall to kiss her again. Malia’s hands, in turn, found themselves on Kira’s back, tracing their fingertips along her spine. When she reached Kira’s hips, she began tracing kisses along Kira’s jawline and neck, making the kitsune sigh in pleasure. As she bared her neck to Malia, Kira felt the hands make their way past the waistband of her leggings and move down to cup her butt, squeezing slightly. Malia’s hands pushed the leggings, and the panties underneath, down until Kira was able to kick them off._

_Kira then began to take the lead again, pushing at Malia’s waist slightly as she kissed along her collarbone, walking forward and causing Malia to stumble back. When she felt the resistance of the bed pushing against their legs, she gently pushed Malia down, smiling when the motion caused Malia’s breasts to bounce a little. Malia crawled back until she was fully on the bed, resting her head on the pillow and admiring the view of Kira above her. She had climbed onto the bed above Malia and straddled her for a moment, just looking at the beautiful girl underneath her, smiling broadly when she felt Malia’s hands gliding along her legs, making their way to her crotch. As a finger ghosted along her folds, Kira gasped, arching her back slightly. Malia teased her for a few moments before returning the hand to Kira’s hip, running both hands up Kira’s sides before cupping her breasts. She smiled, thumbing at the nipples, enjoying the sight of Kira starting to come undone. She leaned down, pressing a kiss to Malia’s lips, before leaning back to look at Malia’s face. She didn’t say anything, but put a hand to her cheek, rubbing her thumb along it, then gently pushed Malia’s hair back behind her ears. She smiled at her lover, and brushed her nose against Malia’s in an eskimo kiss, causing her to giggle._

_At that, Kira began kissing along Malia’s jaw, just as Malia had done to her earlier, and made her way downward. She kissed Malia’s neck at her pulse point, which betrayed her emotional state, with her heart racing in excitement. Kira smiled as she continued, grasping one of Malia’s breasts as she kissed the other, teasing her nipple with soft licks before taking it into her mouth, sucking gently. She looked up to see Malia’s eyes closed, mouth open, and felt her body arch up underneath her. She ground down onto Malia, stilling her, and released her stimulated nipple to give the other the same treatment. When her hand moved to the sensitive nipple and brushed a thumb against it, Malia moaned, seemingly unaware of just how turned on she was. Kira smiled as she released her mouth from the other nipple and kissed her way back to the center of Malia’s body. As she made her way lower, Kira moved back and sat back on her heels before unbuttoning Malia’s shorts, pulling down the zipper and removing them and her panties in one swift move. As Malia lifted her hips to allow the clothing to be pulled off, she rose onto her elbows to look down her body at Kira, who had positioned herself to lay on her stomach, hands on Malia’s inner thighs. They made eye contact, and Kira leaned her head down to lick an experimental stripe up Malia’s heat, keeping her eyes locked on Malia’s, which widened in surprise and arousal._

_Not wasting any time, Kira licked again, this time ending by flicking Malia’s clit with her tongue, and Malia’s elbows gave out as she collapsed back onto the pillow with a groan, her hands covering her face. Kira chuckled, excited that she was able to cause such a reaction, and took the bud into her mouth as she sucked, gently flicking it every now and then. One of her hands made its way to her folds and she ran a thumb along them, feeling how wet Malia had gotten. She gently pushed a finger between them, circling her vagina slowly as she continued her ministrations on Malia’s clit. Malia pushed against her, urging her on, and Kira slipped the finger inside of Malia, eliciting a moan. She curled the finger upward and prodded her g-spot, making Malia arch up again. Kira continued to move her finger inside of Malia and pulled her head back slightly to blow cool air on Malia’s clit, which in turn pulled a gasp from the werecoyote. When her mouth found its way back down to the bud again, Malia’s hands threaded their way into Kira’s hair, and her muscles began to tense up, her thighs clenching, and it was all she could do to not scream out in pleasure when Kira drew out her orgasm. She fell back onto the bed, and sighed before chuckling a little, and she pulled Kira up to her for a kiss, smiling when she tasted herself on Kira’s tongue._

_“I’ve never felt that good before,” she whispered to the kitsune, and wrapped her legs around Kira’s waist briefly, making the other girl think she wanted to cuddle, but suddenly rolled over on her side before flipping them so that she was on top._

_“Your turn,” she muttered, mirroring Kira earlier on, voice heavy with lust as she smiled down at her lover. She grasped Kira’s hands, lacing their fingers together, before leaning back down to kiss her fully, pressing Kira’s hands into the pillows on either side of her head._

_Malia knew she wanted to treat Kira as well as she was just treated, but her body betrayed her, making her feel blissfully weak, muscles tired and mind relaxed. She continued to kiss Kira, releasing one of her hands to drift down their bodies, setting it along Kira’s thigh. Malia pressed against the leg, gently pushing them apart, and caressed Kira’s labia, her thumb rubbing against her clit. Kira moaned into their kiss, her body writhing, wanting more, and Malia gave it. She massaged Kira’s clit, circling it until she was arching off the bed, pulling away from the kiss to curl over as she orgasmed, and Malia leaned down to kiss along Kira’s neck as she came down from her high. Too tired to move, the two lay like that for a few minutes, tangled together, and Kira slowed down her breathing as her body relaxed. Neither one said anything, not sure what could be said, and so Kira turned onto her side, unable to face Malia, instead pulling Malia’s arm around her body to curl up against her after pressing her lips to Malia’s hand._

_“Don’t go. Please.” Malia whispered as she tightened her hold on Kira, who began to silently cry, and drifted into a fitful sleep._

As she falls asleep in her dream, Malia feels herself waking up to the reality around her. She didn’t wait for the end of the memory to play out, because she knew what would happen. She knew that she would feel the bed shift as she changed position that night, reaching out her arm to find Kira gone. She knew that she would eventually make herself get up and find her clothes in a neat pile at the end of the bed, and a note in Kira’s handwriting that simply stated ‘I’m sorry,’ still damp on one corner where a tear had fallen.


	8. You'll always paint my sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Malia makes peace with her feelings about Kira.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The whole stargazing subplot sort of got away from me, so I apologize that it didn't get incorporated nearly as much as intended. Also, I know the Vulpecula constellation isn't visible in California, but I wanted it to work for the story so we'll pretend that it is.
> 
> You can find me at gaycoyotes.tumblr.com

Malia found her way to the edge of the bed, dangling her legs so her toes just barely skimmed the floor, and put her head in her hands. As she bent over to rub her eyes, as though to erase the memories that flooded over her, she felt Lydia sit up as well, scooting up behind her and wrapping one arm around Malia’s waist and placing her other on Malia’s back to rest her hand on her shoulder. No words were exchanged for a few moments, the room full of the sound of Malia’s racing heart and Lydia’s gentle kisses to the side of Malia’s neck. The redhead’s hair draped over Malia’s shoulder, tickling her arm.

“I’ve got you,” Lydia muttered into Malia’s ear, and she couldn’t tell if her voice was husky because she was trying to be calming or if she was still so covered in the fog of sleep that her voice was still working on catching up with her.

“Sorry I woke you,” Malia responded, placing her hand on top of Lydia’s. At that, Lydia pulled her head back, though she kept her arms in place.

“Didn’t I tell you a while ago that you need to stop apologizing?” She asked, chastising her girlfriend, but her voice carried no weight. She leaned her head back down, resting it on Malia’s shoulder. “Did it work?” She kissed Malia’s shoulder again before leaning her head to the side so that she could listen better.

Malia hesitated before answering, fingers lightly skimming over Lydia’s hand absentmindedly before she grabbed the hand and pulled it to her mouth to press her lips to it. 

“Yeah,” she whispered. “At least I think so. I remembered it all, down to finding the note she left after taking off before I woke up.” Malia felt a few tears creep into her eyes, and this time she let them fall, running down her face.

“If you’re being honest with yourself, would you have preferred she stayed until morning, to say goodbye to your face? To leave after giving herself over to you?” Lydia asked tentatively. Malia groaned slightly, making a smile find its way to Lydia’s face.

“Why do you always have to be right?” She asked, which was answer enough.

“I’m not  _ always  _ right. Just usually,” Lydia said, kissing Malia’s neck again. “And I’m still certain that I’m right about you being able to find the strength to move past this. I’ve been thinking,” to which Malia couldn't help but scoff a little. The banshee was  _ always  _ thinking. When Lydia started again, Malia could hear the smile in her voice.

“As I was saying, I’ve been thinking about what Kira meant to you. You love her, you know that, but maybe what you don’t realize is what that love means. Love is... a simple and undeniable power, especially when it comes to the supernatural. It can serve as an anchor, like with Allison and Scott, grounding you and helping you remember who you really are. But love can also be a catalyst for change, prompting your supernatural side to take over a little more. I think your love for Kira is a combination of that. The connection you have with her makes you understand who you are as a person and helps you understand yourself better after opening up your heart so much. But the strength of your love, and the pain of losing her give in to your wild side as the emotions override your sense of self. And thus your coyote form emerged, in the heartbreak that flooded your senses. 

I think the transformation took some time because you were still overwhelmed with shock and confusion about your feelings when Kira first left. But with some time to reflect, even if you didn't realize it was happening subconsciously, your coyote side took in everything you were feeling - the heartbreak, anger, and disappointment - that stemmed from your love and helped you evolve. The coyote came to the surface when you needed an escape, when you needed to just let go. At least, that’s my two cents on it.” 

Lydia knew Malia needed a moment to digest everything she’d just been told, and so she moved her arms to wrap fully around the werecoyote, holding her in a loose hug, and rested her head on her shoulder. Her eyes were closed, but Malia could tell that Lydia was still awake, if only just. She moved her hand to rest on Lydia’s head and hung her own, closing her eyes, but in contemplation rather than tiredness.

Everything Lydia had said sounded plausible, especially considering how much Malia had gotten used to burying her feelings. It wasn’t an intentional action, but ever since she was returned to a human state, she wasn’t sure how to emote properly. After being stuck in her coyote form for eight full years, she felt like she had lost an essential part of her humanity, and her anger and abrasiveness were the predominant feelings she expressed. It was more a way to protect herself and guard her heart from further damage, but as she grew closer to her friends - her pack - she willed herself to open up more. They had all welcomed her into their group after a difficult time in their lives, and she often felt as though she had to tread lightly to not disturb the dynamics between everyone or disrupt their mourning period. The guys tried to move past the trauma, as men often do in her experience, but Lydia and Kira provided a strange dichotomy. Lydia had known Allison for longer, and she also was more connected with the deceased huntress. Lydia sort of grew up with her, so to speak, when it came to the supernatural world, at least from what Malia could tell based on Scott and Stiles’ stories about the two of them. But Kira was completely different, more similar to Malia.

Kira was the new girl toward the start of junior year, and she wiggled her way into the pack rather unconventionally - she overheard a conversation about people going crazy, explaining that what they were talking about sounded like something called “bardo,” and then a few nights later she was kidnapped and discovered the beginning of her supernatural abilities. Malia remembered bonding with Kira over strange circumstances drawing them closer with their friends. Being transformed from a coyote back into human in a forest by a werewolf was just as strange as anything else, from what Malia figured. Still, she was constantly surprised at where she and Lydia were now. So much had happened over the past few years and things just kept getting crazier and crazier that it was hard to believe the calm and peace that had finally arrived in Beacon Hills. The school year was letting out in a week, and then there would be a summer full of god-knows-what. All of that stress, added to the stress of Kira, definitely made for a likely reason for why her inner coyote bubbled up to the surface to demand a break from it all.

Malia pulled her head back up, running a hand over face and rubbing her tired eyes, before turning to look at Lydia. Just as she opened her mouth to respond to Lydia’s explanation, she heard a subtle snort and smiled as she realized Lydia had fallen back asleep, draped over Malia’s back. Her head was still resting on Malia’s shoulder, mouth slightly open, and she was snoring ever so softly. Deciding to let her girlfriend sleep, Malia slowly maneuvered her to lay back down and curled herself around Lydia, pressing a kiss to her forehead before settling her own head down on the pillow.

* * *

 

“I think you’re right,” Malia said as she heard Lydia waking up to the sun streaming in through the window. She smiled as she watched Lydia squint up into the light before reaching her arms up in a stretch, her legs elongating under the blanket to fully release the tension of sleep from her body. Lydia turned around to face Malia, brushing her hair out of her face as she stared into Malia’s eyes. 

“You’re going to have to be more specific than that,” she finally said, a smile tugging at her lips. She knew full well what Malia was talking about, but she would never tire of hearing her talk about how smart she was.

“What you said last night, dumbass,” Malia said, a smile on her own face as well. “About Kira, and my coyote, and all that other stuff. It makes sense, and I think I’ve finally cleared the air about it, with your help.”

“That’s quite the declaration,” Lydia said. “What exactly do you mean you’ve ‘cleared the air’?” 

“Well, that first night you helped me realize that remembering Kira is what triggered my shift. And I came to the realization after that that I love her. But until you said what you did last night, I hadn’t thought about the fact that my coyote shift was triggered by me wanting to  _ escape _ , to get away from what I was feeling, or at least dim those feelings so much that I wouldn’t have to face them. When I shifted again, after asking you out and coming out to my dad, it was my love for Kira combined with a hope for us that triggered it,” Malia continued despite a blush rising to her cheeks. “But when I fell asleep in my coyote form, I dreamed of her again and the raw emotions I felt forced me back into my human form. That’s why I wanted to remember when she and I were one, when we had sex. I wanted to make myself remember the night that everything leads back to, the memory that my heart wanted to hold on to but my mind wanted to hide. That night, and the feelings I had both during and afterward, are what have been both prompting and inhibiting my shift.” 

She stopped, taking in the sight of Lydia listening in front of her. She wasn’t sure why, but she felt a sudden hesitancy, as though she wanted to just back out of the entire situation and go back to the blissful ignorance of how she felt about Kira, but then she realized she never would’ve gotten to be with Lydia in this way if it weren’t for her courage to face the situation in the first place. When Lydia didn’t say anything, but instead raised her eyebrows and smiled gently in encouragement, Malia took a deep breath and continued again.

“I want to camp out at Lookout Point tonight. You said once that you could teach me the stars and I would know that the same stars would be over Kira's head, so I was thinking we could do that. Would that be okay?” Malia felt like she was holding her breath, waiting for Lydia’s response. She knew it was silly, but she couldn’t help but worry that once Lydia helped her figure out the coyote shift she’d be left alone again.

“I think that sounds like a great idea,” Lydia responded with a smile. “Now how about we get the day started with a little breakfast?” She asked, already starting to get up. Malia was grateful that Lydia seemed to be able to tell when she was getting uncomfortable with a situation. 

As Lydia walked on her knees over to the edge of the bed, she stopped when she felt Malia’s hand grab her wrist and turned to look at her, a confused smile on her face. Before she could ask what was up, Malia pulled her down on top of her and kissed her passionately, hand sliding under Lydia’s shirt to lightly trace fingers along her spine. When Lydia pulled back for some air, Malia moved her hands down to Lydia’s hips and pushed her back up to sitting.

“Just wanted a little appetizer,” Malia whispered in Lydia’s ear as she leaned forward. When Lydia blushed slightly, Malia smirked and pulled herself out of bed before putting her hand out for Lydia to take. The two made their way to the kitchen and enjoyed the smell of the pancakes Henry had conveniently just finished making. Lydia realized Malia could probably hear him cooking, which is why she had gotten up to eat.

“Good morning, ladies,” he said with a smile when he turned and saw them walking in. Lydia released her hand from Malia’s and walked up to Henry, throwing her arms around him in a hug. 

“Good morning, Henry,” she said brightly. “I just wanted to say thank you for raising such a great daughter.” She turned back to Malia and pressed a kiss to her cheek before sitting down at the table, taking in the sight of the two Tates standing there dumbstruck for a second. Her compliment was genuine, and she smiled broadly knowing how much it meant to both of them. Henry was constantly doubting his parenting abilities after losing the rest of his family, including Malia for a while, and his daughter never seemed to understand how special she was. When they continued to awkwardly stand there, Lydia started talking again.

“Are you guys going to make me eat alone? Cause that’s just rude manners,” she teased, and they smiled at each other before sitting with Lydia, Henry seated across from her while Malia sat on her right side. The girls held hands as they ate, an easy feat considering that Lydia was left-handed and Malia was right-handed. Henry took in the sight of them and smiled, happier than he could’ve expected.

* * *

 

By the time the sun was beginning to set, Malia felt like a nervous wreck.  _ It’s just the stupid stars,  _ she reasoned with herself, not entirely sure why she was so anxious. Okay, she did know, but she didn’t want to admit it. She’d made so much progress in the past few weeks that she was scared to fuck it all up by getting cold feet in moving forward. Before she had too much time to think about it, though, she heard Lydia’s car pull up outside and she grabbed her backpack before heading out of her room. Henry was waiting in the entryway, chatting with Lydia, and Malia smiled at the duo when she got to them.

“Now, I just want you girls to stay safe,” he said, looking slightly uncomfortable. “I know you’re sort of used to the woods now, Malia, but just promise you’ll call if something happens.”

“Of course, dad, I promise.” She knew that he still worried about her, still not sure he understood the story about what had happened to her. How she could’ve survived in the woods for eight years but not have any awareness of the supernatural. Once again, Malia thought about telling him everything, but thought better of it as Lydia subtly wrapped her arm around Malia’s, pulling her attention away from that particular worry.

“Thanks again for letting us borrow your tent, Henry,” Lydia said as she started to steer Malia out the door. She gave a wave and turned around, and Malia barely had a chance to smile and wave at her dad before they were at the car.

“Why the rush?” Malia asked once they were out of sight of the house.

“It’s supposed to be cloudy later tonight, so I wanted to get a head start on the stargazing,” Lydia responded simply, a smile on her face. “I’m really glad you’re doing this, and even if it doesn’t work, it was at least something.” Malia only nodded in response, leaning on Lydia as she drove. She hadn’t slept well the night before, not able to fall back asleep for a few hours after their chat. She was undoubtedly excited to learn about the stars, but also ready for exhaustion to take over and let her sleep.

The drive was relatively short, well-traveled by now, as they had been to this place so many times before. The stars shone brightly overhead, but Lydia was right - a small cloud formation was moving in, and while the weather didn’t predict rain, it did predict a foggy sky. 

Lydia rolled out the blanket as Malia pitched the tent, so that as soon as the stars became less visible they could go inside the comfortable shelter. When she was finished, Lydia called Malia over, and they laid down together, heads at the same level, and Lydia began to point out celestial bodies, her pointer finger tracing across the night sky. After a while, Malia felt her eyes start to feel heavy, but she could tell Lydia was enjoying herself, so she didn’t say anything. A small smile ghosted onto her face when she looked over at Lydia, who was completely entranced with what she was describing. She told Malia the stories of the myths that inspired the constellations, and paused to elaborate further on her favorites. Malia thought again of how Lydia's voice was like music to her ears and didn't even notice she'd closed her eyes until she felt a nudging in her side.

“You still with me?” She heard Lydia whisper.

“Always,” Malia responded without thinking. And it was true. No matter what they faced from here on out, Malia knew she'd always be there for Lydia. She opened her eyes again and noticed the clouds almost covering the entire sky.

“There’s one I saved for last, and I wanted to make sure you were paying attention” Lydia said, teasing a little. “It’s the one I thought might be most important to you. Look up there,” she started as she pointed to a section of the sky almost on the horizon. They both had to squint to see what she was pointing to. “There’s a constellation called Vulpecula. It means ‘little fox’ and I thought it could symbolize _your_ little fox, out there in the desert.” She smiled and turned her head to look at Malia, who was silent. When she saw that Malia was crying, her eyes clenched shut and tears running down her face, Lydia bolted upright, the smile lost in worry, leaning over Malia until her face and hair were covering Malia's field of view.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” She whispered. She knew Malia could hear her perfectly fine. “Talk to me, babe.” Concern scrunched up her brows, her eyes wide in worry. She placed one hand under Malia’s shoulder and grabbed one of Malia's hands with her other one, gently pulling her up to sit. When she was upright, Malia pulled her knees up to her chest and sniffled before wiping her face and opening her eyes, wrapping her arms around her knees.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Malia tried.

“Bullshit,” was the response she got. She couldn’t help but chuckle and looked over at Lydia, who looked on the verge of tears herself.

“I promise, I'm okay. I just need a minute? I want to do something, I’ll be right back.” Malia got up before Lydia could consider what she’d said, and walked over to the ledge to get down on her knees, sitting back on her heels, looking at the last spot Lydia had pointed out. Lydia wanted to follow, but knew she should keep her distance. Instead, she went back to the tent, knowing Malia would return when she was ready. 

“Hi, I guess,” Malia started, staring up at the vast black ocean above her, her hands subconsciously fiddling with each other just as Kira used to do. “I know you can’t hear me, obviously you can’t hear me, I’m talking to the stars and not you. But I had this idea and I figured this was as good a time as any. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to talk to you again, if I’ll ever see you again. And I need to do this, some way or another, so talking to a cluster of stars that are called Little Fox are as good a way to do it as any.

I love you. There, I said it. I love you, Kira Yukimura, my Thunder Kitsune. From the time that I first saw you, when you were in the back of Stiles’ jeep when the pack came to pick me up before heading to Mexico, I was in love, I just didn't know it yet. You were the most beautiful person I’d ever seen, and dancing with you in that club was the most fun I had ever had. You quickly became my best friend, and my only girl friend. I had Lydia, but she had just lost Allison and we both knew she needed her space. 

You came here with me, to Lookout Point, for our first date, and called me beautiful. I was an idiot and didn’t know what to do in that situation, so I awkwardly said thank you before bringing you home.  You asked me to be your girlfriend the summer before senior year started. I didn’t know if you were serious or not, so I didn’t answer immediately. I should’ve taken you into my arms then, kissed you, made you feel loved. I know that wouldn't have been enough for you to stay. I know you felt like you had to leave, and I can understand your reasons. That doesn’t mean I agree with them, but I can see why you did what you did.  We only got a few months together, but they were the best of my life. I never knew being with someone could be so easy, so reassuring. I never knew that being away from someone you truly love, even for a few minutes, could make me feel so damn homesick. You became my home, Kira. You became my world entire and I love you with every part of me. My coyote side especially will always love you, as you are the one who brought her forward.

But I can’t keep holding on to you like this. I can’t let you hold my heart captive anymore. I need to move on, and Lydia is helping me with that, if you can believe it. Of course you can, you’re Kira. You always see the best in everyone, and that’s such a good thing, especially when you looked at me, because you saw beauty in the ruins of me. You built me back up, and I didn’t even notice I wasn’t who I could be until you came into my life. But just as you built me up, when you left I felt a part of me leave with you, a piece of me was torn down. And that was my fault for putting my heart in one place, but Lydia has been helping me get my heart back, to find my way back to who I am without you. Lydia might sometimes be just as closed off as me, but we’re helping each other with that. I’ve stopped comparing myself to her as well, I know from experience that comparisons don’t help anyone. I was never as smart as her, or as kind as you, or as trusting as Scott, or as clever as Stiles. But I have my own strengths. I’m strong and determined and loyal. Hardheaded as hell, but you knew that already.

I guess by now you already know what this conversation is for. I needed to let you go, but more than that I needed to say goodbye. Lydia is right, I don’t think either of us would’ve been able to bear it to say goodbye after that night, and if I were you I would’ve left in the same way. Except I don’t know that I would’ve had the courage to show up at my place like you did. You always had a hidden ferocity that I admired. I know you’re kicking some desert warrior ass and taking names, assuming they have names. You’re stronger than you realize, wiser than you think, and more loved than you could imagine. We all love you and miss you. I love you, Kira. I’ll always love you. 

Thank you, my Little Fox.”

Malia sat there for a few more seconds, taking deep breaths, trying not to cry again. Being able to say all of that to Kira’s face would have been better, but Malia doubted she would’ve had the bravery to do so if she had the chance. This would have to do.

She got up and brushed the dirt off her pants before walking back to the tent. Lydia was laying on her stomach, feet kicking in the air behind her, and her head rested on her clasped hands. She looked up at Malia as she came in, surprised to see a smile on her face.

“You okay?” She asked again, gentler than before. Malia sat down next to her and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

“I am.”

“What were you doing?”

“Saying goodbye,” Malia responded, smiling. She threaded a hand in Lydia’s hair and pulled her closer, kissing her fully. When she pulled back, she leaned her forehead against Lydia’s.

“Thank you. For everything. For you.” She looked into Lydia’s eyes and saw a few tears drop, happy crying as she smiled.

“And thank you,” Lydia whispered. She rolled off her elbows and onto her side, putting a hand in the crook of her hip and resting her head on the other. “What now?” She asked.

“Now we sleep,” Malia said with a smile, eliciting a giggle from her girlfriend. She made quick work of undressing, throwing her clothes in a pile haphazardly in the corner and sat back for a moment before transforming into her coyote, licking a little at Lydia’s face before rolling onto her side. Lydia laughed a little more before kissing the top of Malia’s head and curling up with her, resting her head on Malia’s stomach and wrapping an arm around her body.

For the first time since Kira left, Malia slept dreamlessly, and when she woke up she discovered she had retained her coyote form through the night.


	9. You're my horizon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Malia and Lydia reveal things to Scott and Stiles, and Malia has a heartfelt conversation with her dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final leg of this fic, thank you all for sticking through it with me!! This is my first actual series with a plot, rather than a character study, and I had a lot of fun writing it. The next part of the series Under Pink Skies will hopefully be started in the next week or so, and will follow Malydia through season 6, in which they are dating instead of having a Stydia endgame during the finale of 6a.

“Are you ready?” Lydia asked Malia, squeezing her hand. “We can always do this another time, there’s no rush.”

“I’m ready if you’re ready,” Malia responded, a little jittery from her nerves but otherwise excited. She turned to smile at Lydia before the two got out of the car and Malia began to undress. Lydia simply watched her girlfriend with a smile plastered on her face, big and goofy and uninhibited.

“This is where you’re supposed to call Scott, remember?” Malia teased as she unhooked her bra. When she was finally nude, she walked back up to Lydia and gave her a kiss and a smile before placing her clothes in the front seat of the car and quickly transforming into her coyote and running back into the woods. Lydia simply shook her head, still smiling, and unlocked her phone to call their friends.

“Hey Lydia, what’s up?” Scott asked as he answered.

“Not much, but do you think you and Stiles could come down to the preserve? Malia and I have something to show you.”

“Are you guys okay?” Worry was evident in Scott’s voice, and Lydia couldn’t help but laugh, both in nervousness and in humor.

“Yes, Scott, we’re fine. Just get down here.”

She didn’t wait for a response before hanging up, not wanting to give away any of the surprise. She and Malia were planning on killing two birds with one stone, so to say, and neither of them wanted Scott or Stiles to be able to figure either part of it out. There had been no indication that when Malia absorbed her mother’s powers she would end up with the ability to perform a full-shift transformation into a coyote, and so she wasn’t too nervous about them being able to discover the new talent. But they had just recently found out that Derek was now able to perform the same type of transformation, from their time in Mexico. As Lydia sat on the cliff overlooking her hometown, she couldn’t help but wonder if Malia’s abilities were somehow tied to her Hale ancestry as well. She didn’t have much time to ponder this before the sound of tires rolling over the dirt and gravel of the road into Lookout Point, though, and she jumped up to greet their friends.

Scott had elected to ride with Stiles, as his motorcycle wasn’t incredibly stable in the woods, plus taking one vehicle was easier for their quick arrival. They both got out of the car, Stiles tripping on his way down, and Lydia could see the tension on their faces.

“What’s happening? Something come to interrupt our last high school break?” Stiles asked, a little agitated. The past semester had been tumultuous, to say the least, and everyone was still trying to settle back into their regular routines, free from the supernatural for now.

“Something, yes,” Lydia started, not entirely sure how to broach the subject at hand. She and Malia had discussed different ways they could spring the surprise, taking a few weeks even to think about the best way to do it. They’d experimented as well, with different stimuli and prompts, to find that Malia had as close to complete control over her coyote as she possibly could. Finally confronting her memories and saying goodbye to Kira was the catalyst that she needed to be able to find control. She was still anchored by the love she felt, but she was learning how to open her heart more, to be more open with Lydia and able to confront her subconscious. Malia had wanted to burst into the clearing and scare Scott and Stiles, but Lydia was worried that one or both of them would react unfavorably at first before discovering who the coyote really was.

“Okay, even for you, you’re being vague,” Stiles said. Scott was still silent, which seemed unusual, but Lydia noticed him looking around the forest behind them, scenting the air. When Stiles turned to see what Scott was doing, he couldn’t stifle a laugh.

“Dude, what the hell are you doing?” He playfully hit Scott’s shoulder with the back of his hand. “Hello, earth to Scott?” He turned back around to face Lydia and gave her an interrogatory expression. Before he could speak, though, Scott turned back around, his eyes glowing Alpha red.

“Where’s Malia?” He asked, eyes locked on Lydia’s. “Something seems different here.”

“Uh...” Lydia started, but she didn’t quite know what to say. They hadn’t considered the possibility of Scott being able to sense Malia’s presence given that he was the one who changed her back to human, but it made perfect sense in hindsight. She was trying to come up with a fake reason for why he could tell something was off, but just then a chipper howl rang out, startling Scott and Stiles. Lydia’s face broke out into another smile, and she rushed to cover it before the boys noticed.

“What the hell?” Stiles asked nobody in particular. His eyes darted around the clearing, but saw nothing. Scott seemed tense, but like he was listening, searching with his extra-sensitive eyes for the source of the sound.

Lydia felt herself moving forward, and she had to look down before realizing that it was Malia behind her, nudging at her knees. A giggle burst from Lydia, who was surprised that Malia was able to sneak up undetected, but remembered when the pack first went looking for her, Allison had revealed that coyotes can “tiptoe” if necessary. Scott and Stiles whirled around when they heard Lydia laugh, and their eyes went wide as they stared at the scene in front of them. Lydia had dropped to her knees, sitting back on her heels, and she stroked the fur of the coyote that had curled up beside her, laying its head on her lap.

“So, guys, meet Coyote Malia,” she managed, still giggling a little. Malia’s snout nudged upward, licking Lydia’s hand in appreciation. Malia flashed her eyes blue as the boys continued to stare in awe at her, surprise and wonder and confusion running across their faces.

“Wait, what? Seriously?” Stiles asked. His mouth was open and his brows scrunched together, as though he literally couldn’t believe the scene in front of him.

“I knew something was different!” Scott exclaimed, still looking a little dumbstruck, but at least smiling. “This is awesome, when did it happen?”

“That’s kind of a long story,” Lydia said. When she didn’t continue, Stiles quirked an eyebrow up, signaling for her to continue. She heaved a sigh before she started to speak again, grasping Malia’s fur as a tether.

“Malia was dealing with some... issues after Kira left. As a slight side effect, she noticed a change one day when she turned into a coyote. She turned up at my door, naked, not knowing who else to go to, and we’ve been working on it ever since.” Lydia felt a bit uncomfortable talking about this on her own, without Malia to help explain things, but she tried to steady her heartbeat so that neither Scott nor Malia would be able to sense that she was anxious. “That brings me to the next point. She and I are dating now, full-on girlfriends and everything.” She smiled, looking down at Malia.

“Oh, wow. That’s a lot,” Stiles said. “I never thought the day would come when my ex and my crush would get together.” He seemed to be muttering to himself more than anyone else, but Lydia couldn’t help but snort in amusement. “Sorry, thought everyone knew.”

“Oh it was obvious,” Lydia teased. “But that’s okay, I’m not complaining. You were one of the first people to see me as I am now, who saw through my ridiculous ice queen act. But you can’t always control the heart,” she said quietly, not looking up to meet his eye. They both knew she was subtly referring to Jackson, remembering the night she went to Stiles in their sophomore year, before they worked with the rest of the pack to finally defeat the kanima and Gerard.

“I’m happy for you guys,” Scott said, beaming. “Really happy.” He kneeled down and tentatively held out his hand for Malia to sniff before carefully petting her. “Get down here, Stiles,” he said, turning his head back to look at his friend.

When Stiles didn’t immediately oblige, Scott pulled him down by his sleeve until he was sitting on the ground, albeit a bit ungracefully. He held out his hand, surprised at how much it was shaking, and actually jumped a little when Malia nipped at it gently. He would swear she _smiled_ when he recoiled. He didn’t immediately go to pet her again, but she reached a paw up and pat his hand before he finally reached forward and pet along her side and scratched behind her ear.

“Wow, you’re soft,” he muttered. A blush rose to his face when he realized he’d said it out loud. That blush became even more prominent when he felt the fur start to turn back to skin, as she began to transform right there, everyone’s hands still on her. Scott simply raised his hand, stepping back a little, not completely sure what was happening, while Stiles _very_ ungracefully fell back onto his ass, his arms swinging wildly as he tried to find stability. He simply lay there as he heard the sound of rustling leaves and footsteps, then the sound of clothes being pulled on, breathing deeply as he lay his hands over his face, covering his eyes.

“You can look now, I’m decent,” he heard Malia say through laughter. She was standing behind Lydia, her arms snaked around the redhead’s middle and her head resting on Lydia’s shoulder. She pressed a soft kiss to the side of Lydia’s neck before putting her chin directly on the shoulder, staring at Stiles. “You alright there?” She teased.

“Don’t be mean, Malia,” Lydia chastised, though she had a smile on her face.

“I’m not being mean, I’m genuinely concerned about Mr. Stilinski here!” But her smile said otherwise.

“Come on, you guys, let’s move on,” Scott said, trying to hide his own smile. He was feeling a wide range of emotions, from pride to embarrassment, but happiness was stronger than anything else.

“Must we?” Malia asked before sighing dramatically. “I’m sorry, that was immature of me,” she said, eyes still locked on Stiles’. “But it’s not like none of you have seen me naked at this point. And yes, that means Lydia has seen me naked, several times now," she said as Scott and Stiles both gawked at them. "So let’s all be mature about this and see it as it is. I can do a full shift into my coyote now, but that also means I’ll be naked in front of anyone that sees me transform. So, let’s at least pretend to be okay with that.” Her eyes still held Stiles’ before he finally looked away.

“Why do I feel like that was targeted at a specific person here?” He muttered, knowing that everyone could still hear him.

“Well, you are the only one of us here who’s dated Malia before, and things didn’t exactly end super well between you two, so it _was_ directed toward you to an extent,” Lydia said, her eyes narrowed slightly. He knew she was mostly messing with him, but now that _she_ was dating Malia he knew that Lydia would be even more protective of the other girl in the pack.

“Come on, guys, let’s just be happy with this unexpected development!” Scott said, looking between Stiles and Lydia.

“Sounds good to me,” Malia said with a shrug. “Now, I need you guys’ help with something else.” She released her hold on Lydia and smiled, a glint in her eye.

* * *

 

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Scott asked. He and Malia were standing in the woods at the border of Malia’s house.

“You know, Lydia asked me a similar question this morning before we showed you guys my transformation,” Malia noticed. Scott didn’t really have a response, and Malia hadn’t really answered the question, but as she took a step forward, he grabbed her shoulder and spun her to look at him.

“I’m serious. Telling people isn’t always the best thing. Especially when someone has actively tried to hunt you in the past.” When Malia didn’t respond, he shrugged, his way of letting her know that it was her call.

“I’m doing this, you don’t have to help if you don’t want to.” She took a deep breath and walked forward to her house, not waiting to see if Scott was going to follow. Just as she turned the doorknob to the wooden door, she heard him sigh and jog to catch up to her.

“If you insist on doing this, I’m not making you do it alone.” And with that they entered her house, ready to potentially change the way her father looked at her.

“Hello you two! Scott, I haven’t seen you around lately, how have you been?” He asked,  a smile on his face and his hand out for Scott to shake. When he took it, Henry pulled Scott into a hug. He would never be able to thank Scott enough for helping get Malia back. The Sheriff hadn’t told him the specifics of how Malia was found, but he did mention that his son and his friends had helped him because they knew the preserve better from their juvenile adventures.

“Hey dad. I think maybe we should sit down, there’s something I want to talk about,” Malia said, not letting Scott answer. She guided her father over to the couch, but once he was seated, she turned to Scott, not knowing how to start.

“You’re worrying me, Malia,” Henry said. “Did something happen with you and Lydia? You can talk to me about that stuff, honey.”

“No, we’re totally fine. This has to do with me. And with Scott.” She realized she was gesticulating with her hands, a habit she picked up from Stiles, and forced herself to calm down and not appear so frantic.

“You’re not... pregnant, are you?” Henry whispered, not entirely sure he wanted to know the answer.

“God, no! No, you do _not_ have to worry about that. I haven’t even been having sex, not that Lydia and I don’t want to, but -”

“You have nothing to worry about with Malia getting pregnant, sir. I promise that’s not a risk,” Scott interjected. He knew Malia was getting better about boundaries, but he hadn’t realized she was still so open about her sex life.

“Okay, then you kids better get to the point, because you’re scaring me,” Henry said. “How am I supposed to know what ‘big news’ a couple of teenagers have besides being pregnant?” The question was more aimed at himself than the two standing in front of him, but they shook their heads.

“I’m sorry. We just didn’t know how else to go about doing this. The last time we had to reveal something like this to our families, it was in a time of emergency. I’m not sure we’ve ever done this when we had a choice,” Scott remarked. He looked to Malia and raised his eyebrows, signaling that it was her turn to talk.

“I’m a werecoyote. There, I said it,” Malia said, throwing her hands in the air. When they came down, she ran them through her hair, tilting her head up in exasperation. “I’m a werecoyote. When the car crashed when I was a little girl, it triggered me to fully shift into a coyote and that’s what I was for the last eight years before Scott changed me back.” Her eyes were a little wild, but she quickly closed them, not wanting to see her dad’s reaction.

“I’m sorry, what?” He asked. He looked from Malia to Scott, who had an apologetic look on his face. “I repeat, what? That wasn’t rhetorical.”

“What she said is true, sir. I’m a werewolf. An alpha, actually, and when I roared at her that day in the woods, she shifted back into being a human being. When you passed out in the woods? That was because our friend Allison shot you with a tranquilizer. We couldn’t let you kill your daughter,” he said quietly. “You had no idea, and nobody is blaming you, but we had to take drastic action.”

Before Henry could respond, Scott flashed his eyes red and flicked out his claws to show him, but didn’t bare his teeth or fully shift his face. He didn’t want to give Malia’s father a heart attack. He looked to Malia, and she made the same motions, revealing her blue eyes. Henry started, jumping back further into the couch, his eyes flicking rapidly between the pair. Malia noticed his uncomfortability and shifted back to her normal form, looking over to see Scott had done the same thing.

“I’m going to need you guys to explain more,” Henry said quietly. He was unconsciously shaking his head, trying to take it all in. Malia went back to the kitchen before returning, bringing two chairs with her so that she and Scott could sit down.

“I’m going to let Scott explain his side, and then when we get to my part of the story I’ll jump in and explain the rest, if that’s okay.” She looked at her father and smiled when he nodded slowly.

“Okay, so to start all of this off, I was bit in my sophomore year when Stiles and I were out in the woods looking for a dead body. Later that year, we discovered that it was Peter Hale who bit me. He was the alpha at the time, and only his bite could change me.” Scott paused, trying to gauge if Henry knew the name Peter Hale, but he gave no indication that he did. “Peter’s nephew, Derek, was captured by hunters - werewolf hunters, not just regular animal hunters - and Peter attacked Lydia on the night of the sophomore winter formal, activating her banshee abilities in the process, but he really just wanted to get Stiles to help him find Derek. Lydia survived, obviously, and she’s been learning more and more over the years about her history.

I later became a True Alpha in the beginning of junior year. That means I gained my status as leader of my pack through strength of character, not by killing an alpha to steal their power or by inheriting it like Derek's sister had, before Peter murdered her. While I was finding control over my wild side, Stiles’s dad, the Sheriff, told us about Malia’s case, and he wondered if she was like me, or if another werewolf had killed her. We helped search for her, which is why you found her doll in Stiles' backpack at school, and eventually found her. You know what happened after I changed her back, from her perspective. Later that same school year, Stiles was possessed by an ancient and evil Japanese spirit, which is why he ended up at Eichen House at the same time as Malia. They connected over their anguish of causing other people pain, because Malia thought she had caused the car accident that killed her sister and mother, while Stiles was feeling the guilt of what the Nogitsune - the dark spirit - had done while in control of him. Malia was released from Eichen and was able to warn us that the spirit possessing Stiles was gaining more control, but after that she kept mostly to herself.

Malia just so happened to be getting the tour of our school a few weeks after all of the Nogitsune business was taken care of, and Stiles and I spent the break before the next semester helping her find control over her coyote side. She joined the pack, and helped us with a lot since then. She also discovered her true parentage after Lydia uncovered the memories Talia Hale stole. I’ll, uh, let Malia finish telling the story.” Scott looked over at Malia and gave her a supportive smile to show that he would back whatever she chose to tell her father - including whether or not to let him know about Peter being her _birth_ father. Henry also turned to look at Malia, and his face was surprisingly calm. Scott wondered if that was just from the shock of all the new information, or if it was because he already knew some of this.

“Well, Stiles and Scott tried to hide my true parentage from me, which I understand now. We discovered that Peter Hale is actually my birth father, and my mother’s name is Corinne. She was a werecoyote too, and she came to hunt me down this past year. She became someone called the Desert Wolf, an assassin and mercenary. She's the one who actually caused the car accident, by shooting at the vehicle. When we finally met after she returned to Beacon Hills, she claimed that I stole her powers when I was born, but obviously I had no say in the matter. Anyway, she found me, but with Scott’s plan, I used some special supernatural claws to drain her power, removing them from her and absorbing them myself. That part even I’m still getting used to,” she said. She didn’t see the need to keep her birth family's identity from Henry, especially considering how close they now were.

“Wait, so the same man who bit Scott is your real father?” Henry asked. Malia raised her brows in surprise that that was the first question he asked.

“Yes it's the same man, but he’s not my real father, _you_ are,” Malia said, getting up to kneel down in front of Henry. She grabbed his hands and looked up at him. “He helped give me life, and as a Hale he probably passed down some power to me. But that is _all_ that he’s done. You, on the other hand, raised me, you’ve loved me all these years, and you continued to love me even after you thought I was gone forever.” Malia reached a hand up to wipe away the tears that had started to run down her face. “You are my father, and you always will be.” She smiled, waiting for Henry to speak again.

“Okay,” was all he said.

“Okay?” Malia heard Scott ask.

“Okay.” Henry smiled, looking at the two of them. “This is Beacon Hills, you guys, it’s not like it’s completely out of the range of possibility for the supernatural to be real. As long as you’re alive and safe, that’s all that matters to me.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of Malia’s head before tilting her head up with his hand. “I love you, Malia. You’re my daughter and I’ll always love you.”

Malia smiled in response and chuckled a little at how much easier this was than she’d expected.

“I have something I actually want to show you, and I waited to tell you about all of this because I needed to have total control over it. I need to step into my room really quickly, though, so I’ll be right back.” She smiled before standing up, jogging to her room in excitement.

A few minutes passed of Scott and Henry awkwardly looking at each other, not sure where to take the conversation. Scott knew what was going to happen, but he was hesitant to reveal anything to her father. Just as Henry was about to ask what was happening, he heard a coyote howl and jumped up, his old instincts telling him to grab his gun. He made himself stay still, however, and found himself smiling when the coyote came trotting down the hall to sit at his feet.

“Malia? That’s you?” He asked, obviously knowing the answer already. The coyote smiled in response, licking his hand.

“This is the biggest part of her new powers,” Scott explained. “After Corinne’s power was drained, Malia found that she could perform a full-shift into her coyote.” He found himself smiling, still not used to seeing Malia in this form.

“All those times, throughout the years. You weren’t just some wild animal terrorizing me. You were trying to come home,” Henry said, tears in his eyes. Malia nudged her snout upwards as a sort of nod, before running back to her room. Henry stood there, looking dumbstruck, until human Malia walked back out wearing a robe. She ran up to her father and gave him a hug, squeezing him tight, before hugging Scott just as closely.

“I just wanted to be able to hug you,” she explained when they both looked at her concerned. “Kind of hard to do when you’ve got four legs.” She chuckled as a few more tears ran down her face. As she pulled away, she heard a knock at the door, and Henry walked over to open it. He stepped back, letting the visitors in, and gave Malia an inquisitive look.

“Oh, yeah, I invited everyone over,” she said with a smile. “I thought we could have dinner together, like one big family. Unless that’s not okay?” Malia was already walking over to Lydia, giving her a kiss to say hello.

“Of course it’s okay, especially now that we’re all on the same page,” Henry said. “How about I just order pizza, though? A bit more people than I’m used to cooking for.” Everyone agreed, and he turned to grab his phone. When he was out of earshot, Stiles conspiratorily leaned in to their semi-group huddle.

“So did everything go okay?” He asked, looking at Scott and Malia. He had been a little grouchy that Malia didn’t want his help in explaining things, but he knew he had a rather convoluted way of laying things out on the table. After all, he’d tried to explain the supernatural to his own father through a chess board.

“It went great,” Malia said with a smile, leaning in to kiss Lydia again. She knew it was petty, but she couldn’t help feeling gleeful when she saw Stiles pull his eyes away from them, gawking slightly. It wasn’t just that she’d gotten over him that made her happy, it was the fact that she’d ended up with _his_ dream girl.

“C’mon, everyone, no need to just stand around, we’ve got plenty of room over here in the living room!” Henry exclaimed as he came back into the room. He, Noah, and Melissa took a seat on the large couch, while Scott, Stiles, Lydia, and Malia took seats around the room, in chairs or on the floor.

For once, it felt as though all was good and everyone was happy, and things stayed that way for the next couple of months during summer break.


End file.
